A Little Healing
by JeremysPrincess
Summary: Harry is attacked and wakes up somewhere unfamiliar. Will be Snarry later on. Also mentions SB/LM. If you don't like slash, I suggest moving on to something else. Rated M for future chapters.
1. Chapter 1

_AN// This story is not perfect, it's nowhere near canon and contains much slash. There are at least 2 gay couples in this story so if you don't like that, please don't read. Reviews are welcome, constructive criticism is welcome, flames will be laughed at and then passed around to other people to be laughed at some more. _

Harry awoke in a soft bed, in a warm, comforting room. He looked around, confused, and didn't recognize anything around him. Rich silks, warm colors mixed with deep blacks, beautiful paintings. This is most certainly not the room Harry slept in last.

"Ow!" Harry whimpered as the pain in his head and gut reminded him of the morning's events. What the hell possessed him to walk around all those shadowed streets that early in the morning in the first place, he wondered.

_/flashback/_

_Harry was wandering the streets of New York City alone. He had been hiding since the media fiasco that immediately followed the death of Voldemort at his hands. He hadn't even been able to apparate to the grocery store for milk without being hounded by countless reporters wanting the next story, so he fled the country and hadn't spoken to any of his old friends in more than six months. He hoped that someday he could go back to England and live a normal life._

_Lost in thought, Harry made a wrong turn and ended up in a very seedy neighborhood. In a hurry to get back to a nicer party of the city, he bumped into a rather nasty looking man who shoved him to the ground, yelling "Watch where you're going, rich boy."_

_Harry tried to get up to leave, but the man had no intentions of letting him leave that easily. He kicked Harry back to the ground and several of his friends came running and they began beating and kicking Harry. _

_When Harry was barely holding onto consciousness he felt his attackers dragging him into an alley and his clothes being pulled off. As one of them entered him roughly, he did the only thing he could think to do he pulled out his wand and stupefied one of his attackers, knowing that the use of his wand would alert the Ministry of Magic and they would send someone to his aid._

_/flashback/_

"I must have a death wish," he muttered, and then laughed at the thought. "Fuck!" he winced again as the laughter brought more pain in his sides and back.

Someone stirred in the room, and Harry realized that he wasn't alone. He scooted to the other side of the bed and curled in a ball, reaching for his wand, and then realizing that he was in just his boxers under the sheets. For a moment he was embarrassed but quickly the embarrassment turned into fear.

"Sirius?" he asked timidly, when he realized who was moving in the chair in the corner.

"Oh cub! You're finally awake!" Sirius exclaimed as he jumped from his chair.

"Where am I?" Harry asked

"Malfoy Manor. My home." Sirius said

"Why are you here? Why am I here?"

"I live here, cub. We've been so worried about you. Lucius healed you with the best of his abilities, but we've had to send for someone else to deal with some of your injuries that we couldn't manage."

"We? Lucius?" Harry asked with a confused look toward Sirius.

"Oh cub there is so much that you've missed during these past months. I'll explain everything later but for right now, you really need to rest and let your injuries continue to heal while we wait for Severus to arrive"

"Severus!?! As in Severus Snape? Why would Snape help me? He hates my guts!"

"We'll talk later cub, drink this and rest" Sirius held a small glass to Harry's lips, and he drank the contents, and then grimaced.

"That stuff is bloody awful, you know." Harry spat.

"Dreamless sleep," Sirius replied, with a little smile, as he helped Harry get settled back into the bed.

"Siri, how did you find me? I've been running and hiding all these months, afraid to let anyone that I know where I am, and you come to my rescue after I get the bloody hell stomped out of me, in the muggle world."

"Lucius is a very powerful wizard, Harry, both in the magical and non-magical communities. He and I have been searching for you since the day that Voldemort died and you saved the world. Luc received word from his private investigator that your wand was used to cast a stunner in New York City, in the US and he gave us coordinates to apparate to. It's a good thing you used your wand because you'd lost a lot of blood. We found you quickly were able to bring you back here before you lost too much blood and had to be transferred to St. Mungo's." Sirius explained. "Rest now and I'll answer anymore questions that you have later, once you wake again."

"Why….." Harry mumbled as he drifted to sleep.

Sirius planted a soft kiss on the bruised forehead of his cub, and said "You'll understand soon cub, I promise" and quietly slipped from the room.


	2. Chapter 2

Lucius intense gaze broke from the flickering fire as his partner walked into the room. "How is he Siri? How's the cub?" He asked as he rose from his chair to meet the exhausted man.

"He woke, and we talked for a moment, but he was still in considerable pain and he was about to freak out a little bit, so I gave him another Dreamless Sleep to keep him from hurting himself worse." Sirius replied sadly.

"Severus will be here before breakfast in the morning with healing potions and salves. From the sounds of Harry's injuries he thinks it may take several weeks of constantly applied salves to repair his skin injuries to avoid scars and possibly heal some of the wounds which have already scarred." Lucius said gently.

"I think we can handle a few weeks of helping him heal" Siri said as he snuggled into Lucius' loving arms. "The emotional impact this ordeal has had on him will take longer than a few weeks to heal. He'll be here with us for a while, I think."

Lucius sighed, knowing he was about to have a very unhappy husband. "I think you misunderstand me Siri. Severus, with his training as a trauma healer, will have to be the one to administer the potions and salves. He knows the proper dosages and applications to prevent further pain to Harry and to speed the healing process. Without Severus, it could take months to properly heal Harry unless he wanted to go to St. Mungo's."

"Weeks? Fuck, Luc! I don't know if Harry can make it through several weeks of Snape being here too. He seemed so uneasy at the thought of just being in Malfoy Manor, with you and Drac here. And you know he thinks that Severus hates him, after the way things always seemed to go in his potions classes."

"You'll help him Siri. I'll help him, and Draco will help him too. Everyone who loves him will help him heal from the horrible things that have been done to him." Luc reminded him.

"I know Luc, but I'm not sure that my cub will ever be the same. I can't imagine anyone surviving the things that he's survived, seeing the things that he's seen and coming out intact. I don't think I could do it. I don't think I know anyone who could." Sirius cried into Lucius' chest.

Lucius remained silent for a moment, thinking, as he held his Sirius to his chest.

"Siri, you need to rest. Would you like me to get you some Dreamless Sleep too? It would help, you know." Lucius asked him quietly.

"I can't sleep, I have to be here for Harry, and he'll lose it if he wakes up with you or Drac sitting with him, especially with all this so fresh on his mind."

"Take half a dose and you'll be awake in plenty of time to be with Harry when he wakes. You need to rest so that you can be there for him, Siri. I know how much your cub means to you, how afraid he is right now and I want nothing more than love and peace for him. Drac and I will keep watch over him while you sleep. Nothing will happen to him Siri, not on my life." Lucius promised, holding his lover close.

"Thank you, Luc" Sirius said, squeezing the man who cared for him so well. "I don't know what I did in life to deserve such a wonderful man, but whatever it was, I'm glad I did it."

Sirius took the vial that Lucius pulled out of the pocket of his robes. He held it to his lips and drank a little less than half of the potion, put the cork back on and handed it back to his lover.

After slipping the potion back into his pocket, Lucius carefully guided an exhausted Sirius down the hall toward their bedroom and helped him out of his clothes and into the bed. After a kiss on the lips and watching his lover drift off to sleep for a moment he left the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

He then went to find Draco to keep him company and help him keep watch over Harry, while he and Sirius slept.

Father and son walked into Harry's bedroom and Lucius transfigured the chair that was beside his bed, into a sofa so that both of them could sit comfortably and make sure Harry didn't have any nightmares or wake up too soon. Even with the potion, they were afraid that all the trauma would make the nightmares stronger than the potion.

Together Draco and Lucius sat on the couch, keeping vigil until the early hours of the morning.


	3. Chapter 3

Sirius stood in the doorway and watched Lucius and Draco for a moment, an obviously exhausted Lucius sitting on the couch with a worried look in his eyes and Draco asleep, with his head in his father's lap.

"Luc, I think you and Draco need to go to bed, it's 5 in the morning" Sirius whispered as he walked up to the couch.

It didn't take much convincing to get Lucius to go to bed, and Sirius carried a sleeping Draco to his room. After placing him in bed, he went back to the master bedroom to check on Luc.

He had made it to the bed to sit down, and fell back on the bed, in a dead sleep. Sirius chuckled and pulled off Lucius' boots, and transfigured his clothes into some pajamas. He pulled the sheets and blankets up over his lover and kissed his cheek.

Sirius slipped quietly out of the master bedroom, and back down to the chair in Harry's room.

Sitting, staring at the walls, Sirius had nothing to do but watch Harry and wait. And wait. And wait. Then Harry stirred.

Sirius was at his bedside in a flash. Harry turned over, a little startled to wake up to Sirius standing over him. He tried to sit up, but found that the pain in his ribs and back was too severe.

"Looks like I'm stuck like this" Harry said with a frown.

"Severus will be here soon with some healing for you" Sirius told him, reaching down to brush the hair out of Harry's eyes.

"So why is Snape coming to help me?" Harry asked again.

"Severus is a good friend to us. He and Luc have always been good friends, and Severus would do anything for Luc, as Luc would for him. Since Lucius and I are together, that 'anything' extends to me, and there's nothing I want more than for you to be pain free." Sirius explained

"So you and Lucius Malfoy are… together?" Harry asked.

"Yes, we were lovers for years, but as a death eater turned spy for the Order, as well as being married to Narcissa for so long, we couldn't risk our relationship going public, and had to be very discreet. No one knew for years, except for Cissy."

"Wow, and I thought I knew all of your secrets" Harry said with a laugh. "I'm happy for you Siri. I'm happy that you have your love now. I always thought it was Remy though."

"Oh cub! You don't know how good it is to hear you say that. I've been so worried about your reaction" Sirius reached out to give Harry a hug, but stopped when he saw the boy stiffen and his eyes glaze over with fear.

Feeling a little sad, Sirius sat back down and continued his conversation with Harry.

"I'm so glad we've found you Harry, I missed you so much!"

"I know Siri, I've missed you too, but I can't stay. I can't be close to anyone anymore. Everyone I love keeps getting killed. It's better that I just stay away!" Harry said with fear and anger in his voice.

"Cub, none of that is your fault! None of it at all!" Sirius said, wishing he could take Harry into his arms and hold him.

"It may as well be. 'Don't get close to Potter, you'll end up dead' everyone says, and it's the bloody truth! First my parents, then Fred, Ron, Hermione, and then Tonks. Next you'll be dropping dead on me and I won't have a fucking person left in my life!" Harry was getting hysterical.

Sirius got up and got a cup of tea for Harry and poured a small dose of dreamless sleep into it and gave it to Harry. Sirius helped him sit up, and propped him up with pillows. His hands shook as he brought the cup to his mouth and took a sip.

"What did I do to deserve this, Siri? What?" Harry sobbed into his tea.

Sirius sat on the edge of the bed, unsure if he should touch Harry or not. He took a chance and reached for Harry. He didn't stiffen or pull away this time, and Sirius enveloped him in a huge hug. "Nothing cub. You've done nothing but brought light to the world and you don't deserve any of this" And he continued to hold Harry until the Dreamless Sleep began to work and he drifted off to sleep.

He laid his sleeping godson back on his pillows and went into the sitting room. He sat down on the couch, intending to stay awake incase Harry woke and needed him, but moments later, he too had fallen asleep, and stayed that way through the night, as did everyone else in Malfoy Manor.

//AN// This is where I shamelessly ask everyone who reads to give me a review and tell me how it's going.


	4. Chapter 4

Green flames came alive in the floo and Sirius jumped from his seat. Severus walked into the room with a leather bag in his hands.

"Where is he?" He asked Sirius, getting right to the point.

Sirius showed him down the hall and into Harry's room. Severus looked annoyed that the boy was asleep.

"I thought this would be a little easier on him if he was asleep, at least while you're looking him over to see what you're dealing with. They did awful things to him. I don't know who did what, but Merlin it's awful, Severus" Sirius explained, starting off in a low, even tone and ended quite angry.

"Well fix him Sirius, don't worry. The physical scars aren't what you'll have to worry yourself with, I'm afraid" Severus said with knowledge in his voice. "It's the nightmares, the torturous flashbacks and the memories that will be the hardest to get through for the boy.

Sirius turned to look out the window, not caring to let the potions master seem his emotions.

"Sirius, if you'll help me, I'll check him over before he wakes. You're right; it will be less traumatizing for him if he's not awake." Severus said softly.

Sirius pulled back the covers and Severus looked a bit taken back by the fresh wounds and the old scars on the young man's body. He looked so thin and frail lying on the huge bed, curled into the fetal position, and covered in bruises and cuts.

Severus got over his shock and surveyed the injuries, making mental notes of the salves and potions he'd use on the boy. Sirius helped him carefully turn Harry, and explained about the back and rib pain that kept Harry from sitting up on his own that morning.

Snape frowned "Muggles inflicted this much damage?"

_/flashback/_

_Sirius ran toward the commotion coming from the alley in front of them. When he reached it, what he saw sickened him. _

_His godson, who he had sworn to protect, was being raped by a muggle while others were kicking him. His mostly naked body was covered in bruises and deep cuts._

_Sirius stunned three of the muggles as a forth ran away. Being a top class auror had its benefits. The muggle police were familiar with him and wouldn't arrest him and the ministry would over look a bit of magic against muggles in this situation. _

_Lucius rushed up behind him and gasped when he saw Harry. Sirius was standing still, looking at the boy with tears streaming down his cheeks. He knew that Harry needed to be tended to as quickly as possible so he bent and gently picked the boy up before wrapping an arm around Sirius and apparating them all back to Malfoy Manor._

_/end flashback/ _

"We're not sure how much is muggle inflicted and how much is still from Voldemort and his death eaters." Sirius told him with a catch in his throat.

"No matter, it will all heal the same" Severus said when he saw the pain in Sirius' eyes.

Sirius sighed. "There is one more thing that I haven't told you about, Severus."

He turned to look at Sirius

"They raped him. Brutally. When we were cleaning him up when we got him home, there was blood all over him. Lucius was able to stop the bleeding from the tears in his anus, but I know there's much more damage…"

"Fuck! Bloody god damn monsters!" Severus lost his temper. "Muggles can be the nastiest little creatures ever born on this earth. I'll take my chances with one of Hagrid's monstrous creatures any day."

"Calm down Severus, you'll wake the boy" Lucius said quietly from the doorway. He'd woken up and been listening to his lover and his best friend talking, cringing at the memories of bringing Harry home the night before, practically every millimeter of his body covered in his own blood. "We've given him a blood replenishing potion last night, and I closed the bleeding wounds, but I didn't want to do much, not with his condition, without getting help from someone with training"

"Good idea" Severus responded. "I should be able to heal the boy with minimal scarring and very little pain. Except the broken bones, those will be painful for a while, unfortunately"

Harry stirred in the bed, and Sirius pulled the blankets back over him, and motioned for the others to continue the conversation outside in the sitting room. Lucius and Severus went out into the hallway and closed the door, giving Sirius a moment to be with Harry while they spoke.

A few minutes later, Lucius came back and sat with Sirius.

"It will take Severus the rest of the day to brew the potions and mix the salves needed to heal Harry properly. He left a few vials of pain draught and some more Dreamless Sleep for him to keep him pain free and well rested until he returns in the morning. I've also assured Sev and Gringots that the Malfoy vaults are open for his taking, should he need any special, or hard to find ingredients for any of the potions that Harry needs"

Sirius leaned into Lucius and thanked him for everything that he'd done and was still doing for his cub.

"I love your son too, Siri." Lucius reminded him. "Anyone who is your family is now mine as well. Your love for Harry is obvious and I'll do anything in my power to help you, help him"


	5. Chapter 5

Lucius and Sirius were curled up on the sofa with Draco napping in the leather armchair, when Lucius heard Harry stirring and woke up Sirius. "Go to your god son my love, he's waking up."

Sirius jumped from the couch, but slowed down quietly to allow Draco to continue to sleep. He made his way to Harry's room, just as Harry turned over and moaned in pain.

Sirius took a pain draught from the vials on the table by the door and took one over to the bed with him.

Harry looked up at him when he came into view from the bed and managed a small smile. "Hi Siri" he said in a small voice.

"Drink this cub, it will help with the pain" Sirius gently held Harry's head up and helped him drink the potion, and then laid him back down on the pillows to wait for the potion to take effect.

"Ahhhh" Harry sighed as he raised his arms, and then moved his head, freely for the first time in…. "How long have I been out Sirius?"

"About 12 hours. You were in a lot of pain and we didn't know what to do, so we kept giving you dreamless sleep until Severus could come with some pain potions. He's gone back to his potions lab at Hogwarts to make some new potions and new pain potions for your injuries." Sirius explained.

"Ah, Snape. I guess I should tell him 'Thanks for saving my ass…again' when he brings back the new potions and such" Harry said with a small smile.

"Harry, you should know something. Severus is the only person with the expertise to apply the salves and correctly administer the potions to your injuries without risking hurting your further, unless you want to have to go to the hospital. He's going to have to stay here for a few weeks with us, while you heal."

Harry panicked. Weeks, with his former potions teacher, the one that practically hates him right down to his soul. Weeks of having Snape's bony hands all over his body.

"Also, Harry, I need to tell you something else about your attack. Do you remember everything that happened?"

"I don't remember it, but I can figure out what happened. I'm dirty and disgusting and used, but I'm not a complete idiot." Harry snapped.

Sirius looked like he'd been slapped in the face and Harry instantly regretted snapping.

"Harry, you're not dirty, or disgusting, or 'used,' you're the same boy you were before the attack, you're just going through a hard time. Luc used some spells to heal you, and Severus finished up the healing, though there will be some discomfort for a while; no one thinks anything bad of you. When we saw you, all we wanted to do was help you." Sirius said the pain evident in his voice.

"You saw me like….that? Lucius saw me like that???? Oh Merlin! Siri…" Harry sobbed.

Sirius sat on the edge of the bed and reached for Harry, but he scooted backwards like a crab, out of reach and pulled his knees up to his chest and continued to sob.

Feeling helpless, Sirius stayed at the edge of the bed and spoke softly to Harry. "No one here will hurt you, cub. No one here will allow anyone else to hurt you again. You are our family, and we love you, no matter what happens to you. Nothing could change the love that we have for you."

"How could it not?! I'm dirty. Who would ever want to love me? How could I let something like this happen? I'm Harry fucking Potter, savior of the entire fucking world, and I can't fend off a few stupid muggles." Harry yelled. He tried to get out of bed, wanting out of this room, out of this house, away from the people who saw him in such a state, but Sirius wouldn't let him leave and cast a sticking charm, leaving Harry no choice but to stay sitting on the bed.

After convincing him to take a sleeping potion, Sirius removed the sticking charm and Harry lay back down on the bed, crying softly. Sirius longed to hold Harry in his arms and to help him forget about the horrible events in his past and move on, but rather than scare the boy further, he just kissed him softly on the forehead and went back to his chair.

Sirius sat in that chair the rest of the day, and into the night. Lucius looked in on him several times and tried to convince him to go to bed and get some rest, but each time he suggested it, he received the same refusal and dirty look. Finally Lucius gave up and went to bed, not knowing what else to do.


	6. Chapter 6

Severus floo'd back into Malfoy Manor just after daylight the next morning and found Lucius asleep on the couch in the sitting room and assumed that Sirius would be at Harry's bedside.

Lucius heard the floo activate, but didn't move until Severus walked toward the couch.

"Lucius, could you get Sirius? I need to get started with Mr. Potter as soon as possible"

Severus followed Lucius down the hall, and waited outside the bedroom while Lucius woke Sirius and explained that Severus needed to get started as soon as possible. Sirius asked for a moment with Harry, and Lucius stepped outside the room and shut the door.

"Cub… cub wake up. It's Siri. I need you to wake up" Sirius carefully rubbed the sleeping man's face.

Harry moaned and Sirius continued to rub his face until he opened his eyes. "Oh, it hurts Siri!" he cried. "Everything hurts"

Sirius silently cried for his cub. How anyone could do this to someone, he'd never understand. "Severus is here to help you Harry. He wants to get started quickly because the potions and salves are most effective when they're first brewed, and we need to squeeze every drop of healing out of them that we can"

"Don't leave me Siri. Please" Harry begged Sirius, with fear in his eyes.

"Never cub" Sirius said, gently rubbing Harry's cheek again. "I'll never leave you alone again, unless you ask me to."

Sirius called for Lucius to let Severus in, and the potions master came into the room quickly and began to set up the bottles, tubs and tubes on the bedside table.

"First we must begin to mend the broken bones." Severus handed a vial to Sirius, so that he could help Harry with it. "Drink this Mr. Potter, it will alleviate some of the pain, and quicken the healing of the broken ribs, which should enable you to breathe easier.'

Harry gagged as Sirius helped him take the first drink of the disgusting potion. "Tastes like troll boogies" he said and coughed as he tried to finish it off.

Severus looked at the broken man lying in bed with his worried godfather looking after him, caring for him, and felt a tug at his heart. He busied himself, opening tubs of salve and vials of potion, to begin to mend the boy's broken skin.

"Harry, we're going to have to uncover you, and strip you, save your underwear, for the time being, so that I can begin to heal you." Severus softly told the boy.

Harry looked terrified as he nodded to Sirius and the older man began to help him out from under the blankets and out of the pajama pants that Sirius had helped him into the night before.

"Perhaps if you turned on your side, toward Sirius, it would be easier for you" Severus suggested.

Sirius helped Harry on to his side, and sat down on the bed beside him, and allowed the boy to bury his face in the side of his thigh. He alternated between smoothing Harry's hair and rubbing his cheek, keeping him as distracted from the potions master who had started to apply salve to the wounds and bruises on Harry's back.

The boy suddenly stiffened as Severus started to work on the wounds on his lower back, nearing the waistband of his underwear. The movement was obvious to Severus. Not wanting to cause the boy anymore discomfort, he continued to apply the salve to the wounds on Harry's back and then moved to the ones on his calves and feet.

Severus had Sirius help Harry turn onto his other side and Harry hid his face in a pillow, and clutched Sirius' hand as if it were his lifeline, as Severus began to heal the wounds on his chest and the front of his legs.

"Harry, please lift your face so that I can heal the bruises," Severus said gently. His heart was aching for the obviously terrified boy and that confused him.

Harry pulled his face out of the pillow but left his eyes closed as he allowed Severus to spread the salves onto his face. He felt the skin tingle as the bruises faded away and he couldn't help but feel grateful to the man who he had thought hated him all these years.

Severus had healed all the physical injuries, but he knew that there were other reasons that Harry was withdrawing from him, and those were things he couldn't heal with spells or potions or creams.

Severus looked at Sirius for some guidance. Sirius looked as lost as anyone could be, so Severus spoke. "Sirius, I think Harry and I need to speak alone for a moment."

Sirius looked confused, but nodded. "Harry, is that okay with you?"

Harry opened his eyes and looked at his godfather. Sirius nodded at him, so he said "Okay, I guess." He sat up in the bed a bit and allowed Sirius to leave the room, shutting the door softly behind himself.

Severus didn't have a clue as to why he was about to open up to the boy, but he couldn't seem to help himself.

"Harry," he began, "You must remember that no one in this home means you any harm. Everyone has been looking for you for months now, worrying day and night about where you've been. Everyone in this house and that includes Draco and Lucius you know, love you and want nothing but the best for you."

"I've started to figure that out." Harry said.

"No one here is going to think any different of you because of what happened. Lucius and I witnessed, and sadly have done, much worse during our years as spies. We hated every moment of it, both of us, but you're not going to scare anyone away, or make anyone hate you. You're a handsome young man that has had some nasty shit happen to him that wasn't in his control. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"No. No. No. I'm filthy. I'm dirty. I'm weak. I don't know why everyone acts like they care so much. They can't possibly care about someone as disgusting as I am." Harry yelled.

Sirius cracked open the door at the sound of Harry's yelling, but Severus waved him back and, trusting Severus' judgment, he quietly closed the door and headed down the hall to somewhere that he couldn't hear his son's outbursts.

"Would you consider me weak Harry?" Severus asked.

"No," Harry said, looking at Severus as if he were crazy.

"Filthy?"

"No."

"Dirty?"

"No."

"Disgusting?"

"No." Harry was beginning to see where Severus was going with his line of questioning. "It happened to you too, didn't it?" He asked.

"Many times." Severus answered.

"How….How did you deal with it? I feel like my skin is crawling. I feel like I can still feel them on me. Every time someone touches me, it makes me think of them again and it seems like that's all that I think about now. Every time I close my eyes, I think I feel their hands on me again."

"It's not easy. It takes a long time to overcome such an assault, such a horrible violation. Everyone here is going spend all their time reminding you of their love, and your worthiness to be loved, but it will still take time, but everyone in this house is willing to take their time to make sure that you overcome the hurdles that you're going to be jumping over the next several months."

Surprising them both, Harry leaned against Severus and began to sob. "I'm scared," he admitted.

"I was too. For months. You'll have the nightmares and the horrid thoughts will come to you when you're awake. A pat on the back from a friend might send you into a flashback that will make you scream in terror, but just remember that no one here, myself included, if going to judge you because of something that was completely out of your control."

"Thank you.' Harry sniffed.

"Don't thank me for having basic human compassion, Harry." Severus said gently. "I'll go get your godfather for you now."

Harry thanked him again as he headed out the door.


	7. Chapter 7

The next morning Harry woke early and decided to check his new home out a little bit. He slipped on a maroon bathrobe that he found in the bottom drawer of what he supposed was his dresser and headed out into the hallway.

He wandered the long hallway until he found the library. Harry was surprised to see that it wasn't the dusty room full of dark objects and books on the dark arts that Harry expected. There was an entire case of books dedicated to quidditch and many novels that Harry recognized to be by muggle authors.

Harry was exploring the different titles and considering pulling one down when a deep voice came from behind him. "I see you've discovered one of our many libraries Harry."

"Hello Lucius." Harry said quietly, involuntarily backing away from the tall blond man.

The hurt was evident in Lucius' eyes, but he also understood the boy's fear. Lucius backed away slowly, until he was on the opposite side of the library as Harry was. He assured Harry that he was welcome to read any and every book in the library, and that he hoped Harry would enjoy them.

Lucius left the room, and Harry felt guilty as he watched him walk away. He pulled down _The Lord of the Rings_ and curled up in an armchair next to the roaring fireplace.

He read several chapters into the book when Draco poked his head in the library and told Harry that it was time for breakfast. Since he had no idea where his clothes were, or if he even had any to wear, he headed down to breakfast in his bathrobe.

Once he reached the kitchen, he knew he shouldn't have worried about looking silly as Sirius was shirtless and wearing fuzzy slippers that seemed to be modeled after centaurs.

Harry took a seat beside Sirius and across from Draco at the enormous breakfast table and began to scoop eggs and sausages onto his plate.

Sirius shared a look with Lucius. Both of them were very glad to see Harry with an appetite. At least there wouldn't be any forcing nutrient potions down his throat as they'd first feared they might have to do.

They ate in mostly silence, the only time anyone spoke was if Lucius commented on the paper he was reading, or Sirius tried to get the boys to help him with the crossword puzzle that he was working on, stolen from Lucius' newspaper of course.

Once the meal was finished and the dishes cleared away, Draco asked Harry to come out back and chase a practice snitch with him. Harry agreed, and told Draco he'd be out back in a few minutes.

Draco happily headed outside and Harry called Sirius over. He explained that the bathrobe was the only clothes he found in his room, and he couldn't quite ride a broom in a bathrobe.

Sirius laughed and took Harry up to his and Lucius' bedroom. He pulled out a pair of black jeans and a black tee shirt and handed them to Harry. "I'm sure you know the charms to make them fit you. You would've never had clothes with your aunt and uncle if you didn't know it." He kissed Harry on the forehead and after promising to take him clothes shopping later, sent him off to his room to dress.

Harry soon found that Sirius' clothes fit him quite nicely. He found his shoes under the edge of the bed and slipped them on his feet before running downstairs to join Draco outside.

He found Draco waiting in the gardens with two thunderbolts. "Dad bought you a thunderbolt when he bought mine. He said we deserved to have the best brooms, since you could have gone pro in quidditch. He probably thought I'd need the best broom on the market to even have a chance to keep up with you." Draco laughed.

After Draco handed Harry one of the thunderbolts, the two boys took off into the sky. Harry was a noticeably quicker flyer than Draco, but he slowed off a little bit to give Draco a fair chance to catch the snitch first. They spent the rest of the morning and a good portion of the afternoon chasing a practice snitch around the small quidditch pitch in the backyard.

Unknown to the boys, Sirius and Lucius had stepped out onto the balcony and were watching them.

"It looks like Harry is having at least as much fun as Draco is," Lucius comforted his stressed mate. "I think Draco will be good for Harry. He'll help him remember that he's still a young man, a young man who is worthy of love and friendship."

"I hope someone can get through to him. He should be more upset than this, shouldn't he? Or if he is upset, shouldn't he be showing it instead of keeping it in? Maybe being with Drac will help him." Sirius said, never taking his eyes off of his godson in the skies.

He and Luc watched the boys until Harry caught the practice snitch for the third time, making the score three on two, and the boys touched down on their brooms and headed up toward the house.

Sirius and Lucius headed down to the kitchen to get food for lunch, they knew both boys would be starving after racing around the air for several hours.


	8. Chapter 8

Later that afternoon Severus came up to apply more salve to the marks on Harry's back and to try some scar cream on his older scars from the war and to talk to him about something.

Sirius went to follow Severus and Harry into Harry's room but he stopped him. "It's OK Siri, I'm not afraid of Severus anymore."

"Are you sure cub? I really don't mind staying with you." Sirius asked, concerned.

"Nah, it's ok. I trust Severus." Harry assured him. He couldn't really understand why, but it bothered him the least for Severus to be around him. Everyone else besides Sirius made his skin crawl. He chalked it up to their shared experienced and headed toward his bed.

Harry stripped down to his shorts and lay down on his stomach so that Severus could start to apply the salves and creams.

Severus spoke carefully, "Harry, I've noticed some scars here that are older than scars from the war."

"I don't want to talk about it," Harry said quickly.

"That's fine. I just thought you should know that once you've dealt with the emotional baggage, scars are much easier to heal." Severus said as he continued to massage the creams in Harry's skin. "Three or four more treatments and all your fresh wounds will only be a memory."

Harry sat up and pulled his pants and shirt back on.

Severus couldn't help but notice the way the jeans hugged his ass just slightly, and the arms were a little snug on Harry's biceps. He forced himself to turn away and busy himself with his potions bottles hoping the boy hadn't noticed him staring.

Harry hadn't noticed Severus' staring; he'd been deep in thought and trying not to cry. He turned to face the older wizard and when he saw that he was busy; he sat back down on his bed and hung his head.

Severus heard the bed squeak and turned around. He could tell that the boy was close to tears and quietly said, "There are many in this house, including myself, who care about you, and will be willing to listen, when you are willing to talk." He gave Harry and pat on the shoulder and went to find Sirius for the boy.

He found Sirius pacing the sitting room while Lucius tried to convince him to sit down. Sirius was having none of it.

Severus cleared his throat and both men looked at him. "I believe Harry could use someone to talk to, though I'm not quite sure who he'll speak to. I have a calming draught for who ever goes in there, because if he does open up, I'm certain that he's going to need to be calmed once he stops talking. I believe he might do best with someone who isn't attached to him much at first. May I suggest Lucius tries to talk to him first?"

Sirius frowned. "He's my godson!"

"Precisely, Sirius. He loves you more than anyone in his life, but he's terrified for you to pity him. Please do trust me on this one. He won't open up easily and the more people who try and get him to talk, the less likely he is to talk." Severus explained, annoyed at the man's thick head.

Lucius stood and kissed Sirius on the forehead before pushing him down onto the couch. After convincing Sirius that he was going to wear a hole in the floor, and convincing him to not barge in if he heard Harry crying or anything, Lucius went down the hall and knocked on Harry's door.

Lucius heard a muffled "Come in," from inside the room, so he opened the door and walked in.

"I hear you might need an unbiased, understanding ear." He said kindly.

Harry didn't speak, so Lucius began to talk again.

"Once when I was a child, I coughed at the dinner table without covering my mouth and my father took me out side and placed the cruciatus curse on me. Just as I thought I was going to black out from the pain he stopped. I couldn't move, let alone get up on my own, so he left me laying there. I laid in the back yard for the rest of the night and half of the next day before I could move all my muscles properly again. I was four years old." He paused to look at Harry before continuing. Harry's tears had stopped and he was looking at Lucius intently.

"Once when I was about eight I was playing catch with my cousin on our brooms and I threw the ball and she missed it and it went through the window. He used a cane on me for hours. 562 lashes before his arm was too tired to continue. He refused to allow any of the nannies, the family doctor, or even my own mother to check on me. I was left lying naked on my bed for the rest of that night, until everyone in the house was asleep and my nanny came into the room and used a spell so that I wouldn't have to go to the bathroom on myself and she sat with me that night, making sure that I didn't hurt myself worse in my sleep." Lucius' face was dark and Harry knew that he didn't enjoy reliving his worst memories.

"You don't have to tell me this," Harry told him. "I know you don't like talking about it. I can tell by looking at your face."

"Your god father is the only person who knows these stories, but I don't mind sharing them with you because I think you understand where I come from." Lucius said.

Harry looked down at the floor, so Lucius continued.

"After I started Hogwarts, I got howlers every other day it seemed like. My grades weren't good enough; I didn't have enough pureblood friends. I wasn't nasty enough to enough muggle-born students; I wasn't good enough to play quidditch. It went on and on. In the summers I'd be beaten for things I did that weren't approved of, and sometimes beaten for things I didn't even do."

Lucius stood up, pulled his robes off and began to unbutton his shirt. Harry scooted backward on the bed. Lucius stopped and placed a hand gently on his shoulder, "Calm down, I want to show you something." He pushed the shirt off of his shoulders and it hung down where it was tucked in his pants. Harry saw something he never thought that he'd see in his life.

"I know you have similar scars, and I know you need to talk about them. You can talk to me, Sirius, Draco or Severus anytime that you wish. Even if it's three in the morning, we don't mind being woken up for something important, and yes, this is important. You can also floo call any of your friends at any time you wish, using any fireplace in the house, and have them come over whenever you want, but you need to talk to someone. Soon."

Lucius put his shirt back in place and pulled his robes back on. He placed the calming draught on Harry's bedside table and told him to take it if he felt he needed it, and to come to someone if he had nightmares.


	9. Chapter 9

_**WARNING: Child abuse and molestation mentioned in this chapter. Also suggests child rape. Skip the italics if that is a trigger for you, or if it just makes you too sick to read. **_

"_No Uncle, please don't touch me. Please don't. I'll be a good boy. I'll clean the kitchen better next time," Four year old Harry cried._

_Vernon Dursley stuck his fat head inside the tiny cupboard under the stairs and reached inside his nephew's pajama bottoms to fondle him. He grabbed little Harry's hand and placed it on his semi-erect cock, forcing him to pet it like he were playing with a dog._

_Light flashed and now he was six and on his hands and knees in the back yard chained to a stake in the ground that was put there for Aunt Marge's dog when they came to visit. It started to rain, and the Dursleys shut the shutters and the windows and left him sitting in the rain. All because a burned pancake at breakfast._

_Another flash of light found Harry seven years old and lying on his stomach across his bed, his overly large tshirt around his shoulders and his jeans and y fronts around his ankles being beaten over and over with Uncle Vernon's long, wide belt. After every inch of skin between Harry's shoulders and his ankles was covered in welts, Vernon stopped. He placed his belt back in his pants and said, "Maybe that will teach you to try and get away from me next time," before leaving the room._

_Another light flashed and ten year old Harry was lying on his uncle's bed, his aunt was out shopping, stark naked with a gag in his mouth._

Harry woke up suddenly and began screaming, "No, no, no, no, nononono. Don't touch me. Leave me alone." His screams were so lound that Draco woke up and raced to his father's bedroom.

"Father, father wake up. Something wrong with Harry. He's screaming at the top of his lungs." Draco said as he shook his father awake.

Lucius jumped out of bed and woke Sirius. "Get up and get your robe on our son has had a nightmare." He sent Draco down to the sitting room with orders to try and sleep on the couch.

Lucius and Sirius rushed into the bedroom, getting there in mere seconds. Harry was sitting in the middle of his bed with his knees pulled up to his chest still screaming the word 'no' with tears flowing down his face.

They went to him and tried to comfort him, but he screamed even louder and scooted as far away from them as he could get.

Lucius left Sirius with Harry and ran down to Severus' guest room in the basement to wake him. He burst in the door without knocking and flipped on the light.

"What in the name of Mer…." Severus started.

"I need something for Harry. He's had a nightmare and we can't get him to stop screaming. He's afraid of me and Sirius and we don't know what to do for him."

Severus saw the pain and anguish in his best friend's eyes and grabbed a couple of vials of potions and his bathrobe and followed Lucius up the stairs. By the time they got out of the basement he could hear Harry's screaming. They raced down the hall and when Severus reached the bedside, Harry scuttled across the bed and wrapped his arms around Severus' neck and didn't scream again.

Severus pried the boy loose enough to uncork one of the vials and coaxed Harry into drinking it. The boy's hysteria calmed and Severus tried to lay him back down on the bed. As soon as he let go of him, Harry began to cry again.

Sirius sat down on the bed and Harry scooted away from him, toward Severus again. Lucius tried the same thing, with the exact same result.

"Severus, would you stay with him tonight?" Sirius begged.

As much as he would have loved to turn the former Marauder down, he didn't want Harry to suffer any more than he already had. "I will stay with the boy until he wakes. However I expect to be left alone for the duration of tomorrow, until time for the boy's next treatment."

"Thank you Severus," Lucius said, shaking his best friend's hand.

"Thanks Severus," Sirius said, looking as if he'd just been kicked in the groin.

Severus tried sitting in a chair next to the bed but the boy began to cry again. He then tried sitting on the edge of the bed but that still wouldn't calm Harry, so Severus gave up and took the boy into his arms and lay down beside him. Harry fell back to sleep quickly and surprising even himself, Severus fell asleep shortly after Harry did and they both slept soundly, Harry tucked safely in Severus' arms, until well into the next morning.


	10. Chapter 10

Harry woke slowly the next morning. Warm and comfortable, he never wanted to move from that spot again. As he came around, he realized that there were arms encircling him and he jerked away and jumped out of bed quickly.

Shaken awake by Harry jumping out of bed, Severus sat up quickly, looking around. He saw a frightened Harry standing against the wall, and instantly knew that he hadn't remembered the nightmare.

"What are you doing in my bed?" Harry asked, half angrily and half frightened out of his mind.

"You had a nightmare last night…" Severus began.

"So you decided to crawl in bed with me?" Harry exploded.

"Harry calm down, Lucius…" Severus started again.

"Get out, get out GET OUT!" Harry screamed.

Seeing that he would get no where with the boy, Severus left the room and went to wake Sirius. He got to the end of the hall and knocked sharply on the master bedroom door. Lucius was the first one out of bed to answer the door.

"I believe that Harry thinks that I am out to get him and it would be best if Sirius went and had a talk with him. He had no recollection of the nightmare last night, let alone latching himself to me and refusing to let go." Severus said. "I am going down to my room. If the boy needs me again, you or Draco can come get me."

With that, Severus turned and headed toward the basement.

Lucius went back into the bedroom and woke Sirius. "Your godson needs you. Apparently he woke up and doesn't remember the nightmare or refusing to let Severus leave last night and thinks that Severus took it upon himself to climb in bed with him."

Sirius got out of bed and put on his bathrobe quickly. He headed toward Harry's bedroom and found him sitting in the middle of his bed with his knees pulled up to his chest.

"Harry? Are you ok?" Sirius asked

"I don't know. I've been sitting here since I threw Snape out, and I'm starting to think I was wrong. I remember having a nightmare last night." Harry said, shuddering.

Sirius offered to listen if Harry wanted to talk about it, but Harry refused. Sirius began to explain that neither he nor Lucius were able to calm Harry so Lucius got Severus from the basement and Harry clung to Severus and wouldn't let him go, so Severus had agreed to stay with Harry so that he could sleep.

Harry insisted right then that Sirius bring Severus back so that he could apologize. Sirius agreed and left Harry in his room while he went to find Lucius, so that he could find Severus.

He found Lucius in the sitting room and after explaining what had happened, Lucius went to get Severus and Sirius sat down in front of the fire with his head in his hands.

Severus had just fallen asleep when he heard someone banging on his door. Grumbling, he got up to answer it. When he saw Lucius standing there, he just walked past him and headed for the Harry's room, expecting him to be hysterical again.

He walked into Harry's room and was shocked to find the boy completely calm except for the tears constantly streaming down his face.

Severus asked what he needed and Harry just held out his hand. He walked to the bed and took Harry's hand, looking at him, perplexed.

Harry began to speak. "It was like my life was flashing through my dreams. I was little; he'd come to the cupboard under the stairs and touch me and make me touch him. Then I was chained up outside for hours in the rain because I burned breakfast. Things like that kept flashing in my dreams until I couldn't handle it anymore. All I ever wanted was to be loved. I did everything he wanted me to do, except one thing, and when I wouldn't, he beat me until I couldn't move for two days, and then did it anyway. All I ever wanted was to be loved." Harry's voice broke and he began to sob.

Severus pulled the boy close to him and held him while he cried. Slowly rocking him back and forth Severus kissed the top of Harry's head and murmured comforting nonsense words to the sobbing young man. He vowed to set Lucius on the man the minute that he could get away from Harry for a moment without upsetting him further. Little did he know, Lucius had been standing outside the door that wasn't closed all the way, about to knock when he heard Harry begin to speak and stopped.

Lucius held his temper as he walked away. The moment he got to the sitting room, where Sirius still sat, locked the door and put up a silencing charm, he exploded.

"I've done horrible things in my life. Horrible things! I've murdered people. Murder! I'm a murderer and what the muggle bastard makes the things I've done look like a school boy's scuffle. I'll kill him. I swear to it I'll kill him." He ranted.

Sirius looked confused at first, but then realized that Lucius had overheard Harry speaking to Severus. "What did you hear, Luc?" He asked quietly.

Lucius hated hearing how quiet Sirius was, he knew that his lover was about to explode. "I shouldn't have heard it Siri. I can't tell you what isn't mine to tell."

"Damn it Luc, he won't talk to me! I can't get him to talk to me! He won't talk to anyone but Snape and now you over heard, and I'm the only one left in the dark. I'm the one who was supposed to take care of him if something happened to James and Lily and I'm the only person who doesn't know what the fuck is going on." He yelled.

Just then a knock came at the door and both men yelled "WHAT?" before realizing that there was still a silencing charm on the room.

Lucius went to the door, leaving Sirius to pace in front of the fire. He found Severus standing outside the door, the left shoulder of his robes soaked as if he'd been in a rain storm.

He explained that Harry wanted to see Sirius. "But it's quite obvious that you already know what happened. Have a listen at the door did you?" He said snidely, never really forgiving the marauder for the years of torment.

"He doesn't know anything; he only knows that something bad happened. I was about to knock on the door when I heard Harry speaking but I haven't told Sirius because it isn't my ordeal to tell." Lucius explained before Sirius could snap back at Severus.

"Nevertheless you need to calm yourself Sirius, the boy needs his godfather and he doesn't need you looking like you're going to rip his head off for speaking to him." Severus said a bit nicer this time.

Sirius continued to pace back and forth in front of the fire taking deep breaths and calming himself as quickly as possible. When he was no longer looking murderous, he sprinted down the hall to Harry's room.


	11. Chapter 11

Harry sat on his bed, silent as the dead of night. He'd cried until no more tears would come, and was silently contemplating the kiss that Severus had placed on his head while he was crying.

It had to just be to calm him down, he reasoned with himself. There's no other sane explanation he was telling himself as Sirius practically ran into the room and over to his side.

"Severus said you needed me." Sirius said, out of breath.

"I just wanted to talk," Harry said. He began to explain everything he'd told Severus. He told him about the beatings, being chained in the yard, the sexual abuse and the starvation. The longer he talked, the angrier Sirius got. By the time he was finished he could tell that Sirius was trying so hard not to show Harry how angry he really was.

"Why didn't you tell anyone at school cub?" Sirius asked.

"I didn't figure it mattered. I always screwed something up, so I deserved to be punished." Harry said, emotionless.

"No one deserves to go through the things that you've gone though." Sirius said with a mixture of sadness and anger in his voice. "I've got to go take care of something, I'll be back soon." He hugged Harry and walked out of the room.

Sirius went back to the sitting room and found Lucius sitting in front of the fire talking with Severus. "I'm going out, I'll be back." He said.

Lucius grabbed his arm before he could apparate away. "I'm going with you," he said.

"And I'll be tagging along as well," Severus said, "If for no other reason than to keep the two of you from ending up in Azkaban and leaving the boy with no one to look after him.

The three men apparated to Number 4 Privet Drive and walked in the front door.

"What do you think you're doing in my house?" Vernon Dursley demanded. "That idiot boy isn't here anymore. He ran off a year ago and if you don't get out of my house, I'll call the police!"

"You'll do no such thing you disgusting, child raping, no good, piece of shit." Sirius screamed. "Remember that murderous godfather of Harry's? You're looking at him!" Sirius lunged for Dursley but Severus grabbed him by the back of his shirt and held him back.

"Remember Black, you'll do the boy no good in Azkaban." Severus said quietly.

Petunia Dursley had come to see what the commotion in the foyer was and when she saw Severus she snidely said "You're that freak boy that used to trail around after my sister like a lost puppy."

While she continued to run her mouth and insult the three wizards, Lucius began to wave his wand in a complex pattern. Vernon felt the magic begin to wash over him like a cold chill. "What are you doing to me?" he demanded.

"For the rest of your life, however short that may be, you will hear your nephew's cries. Cries from when he was a small child and you molested him. Cries from when you chained him in the back yard in the rain, cries from when you took his virginity from him in your own marital bed." Lucius said, pausing for a moment when Petunia fainted. "You'll hear Harry's cries until the day you go insane and kill yourself. No amount of muggle medication will make the cries stop. If you even try to go to a doctor, you'll just be deemed insane and put in an institution but even then, you'll still hear them. Even in your sleep."

Severus was still holding Sirius back from strangling the enormous man in front of them. "Or shall I just let Sirius go and get it over with?" He asked, taunting him.

Severus did let Sirius go for a moment and when he did, Sirius grabbed Vernon Dursley around the throat and began to bang his head against the staircase. When his face was sufficiently bloody, Lucius and Severus pulled him away and apparated back to Malfoy Manor.


	12. Chapter 12

Harry was still sitting on his bed when he heard the crack of apparition and a thunk down the hall. Curiously he got out of bed and went to investigate.

When he reached the sitting room, he saw Lucius and Sirius sitting on the couch, Sirius' hands bloody and Lucius' hair mussed, something he'd never seen before. Severus was sitting in an arm chair staring into the fire. He looked the calmest of the three so Harry went and asked him where they'd been.

Severus simply said, "You'll never have to worry about your uncle harming another person as long as you live."

When Harry threw his arms around Severus, the older wizard pointed to Lucius and explained that it had been he who had weaved the spell that would slowly drive Vernon Dursley to insanity and that Severus himself had only kept the two from being sent to Azkaban for murder.

Harry hugged Severus again and then went to hug Lucius and Sirius. He sat down on the couch between them and put an arm first around Sirius and then timidly the other around Lucius. "Thank you both."

They sat in the sitting room, reading and watching the fire for some time before a sleepy eyed Draco walked in, yawning.

"Did someone forget to invite me to the party?" He asked teasingly.

Harry scooted closer to Sirius and they invited Draco to sit on the couch with them. It was a tight fit, but he squeezed in and Lucius, Draco, Harry and Sirius were soon all squeezed together on the couch, leaving Severus in his armchair by the fire.

Sirius suggested that the boys go get dressed and they'd go out to breakfast and then to the quidditch shop. Both boys jumped up and raced for their rooms. They met back in the sitting room minutes later, but Lucius and Sirius were gone.

"They've went to change. I think you two _children_ forget that your _parents_ are old men like I am." Severus teased.

"I don't think you're an old man," Harry said quietly.

Severus heard the quiet admission but pretended he didn't, and if Draco did, he didn't let anyone else know it as he thumbed through the advertisements from Quality Quidditch Supplies.

Lucius and Sirius were soon out of their bedroom and ready to go. The five men apparated to the Leaky Cauldron and made their way into muggle London for breakfast, heading for a little café that Lucius liked to eat at when he went into the muggle part of town for business.

Once their meal was finished, Lucius had business to attend to and Severus headed for the apothecary for some ingredients, so Sirius took the boys to the quidditch shop where even he turned into a child again.

By the time they apparated home, all three of them had large bags of new quidditch supplies.

Harry and Draco headed out back to try out their new toys while Sirius watched from the kitchen.

He smiled as he saw Harry begin to relax and chat with Draco. The two boys sat in the garden and polished their brooms with the new ultra aerodynamic wax they had purchased and when they were both done, they released a practice snitch and took off into the sky.

Sirius turned his back to the window to get something to drink out of the refrigerator and just as he bent down to look in it, he heard Harry scream.


	13. Chapter 13

Sirius ran outside and saw that Harry was nowhere to be seen. Draco was standing in the garden looking puzzled.

"All I did was bump into him Sirius, honestly." Draco said.

"Don't worry about it son, where did he go?" Sirius asked.

"He landed his broom and then apparated away," Draco answered with a shrug.

Sirius went back into the house and up to his godson's room. He knocked on the door and was rewarded with "Go away!"

"Harry, we need to talk," Sirius said.

"Go away, you could never understand." He said angrily. "You could never understand what this is like."

"Harry please," Sirius pled.

Weakly, Harry answered "Please just give me some time Sirius. I can't handle talking right now."

Sirius went downstairs to tell Draco that Harry was OK and that he could go on to Blaise's house. He then sat in the library pretending to read a new quidditch book until Lucius and Severus apparated back home.

Lucius came in the house to the sight of his lover nearly in tears on the couch in the living room.

He went straight to Sirius and took him into his arms. "What's wrong love?" He asked gently.

Sirius explained that Draco and Harry had been playing quidditch in the backyard when Harry freaked out and apparated to his room and wouldn't talk to him.

Severus was standing outside the living room and as Lucius comforted Sirius, he went upstairs to Harry's room, unlocked the door and walked in.

He was more than surprised when Harry launched himself at him and clung to him like a lifeline, sobbing. He slowly wrapped his arms around the boy and patted him softly on the back, unsure of what to do.

He continued to hold Harry as he sobbed, and unknown to him, he was being watched by both Lucius and Sirius.

Sirius whispered "Why does he open up to him? Why not me, I'm his godfather?"

Lucius whispered back, "I think there is something about Severus that Harry senses. Perhaps it's the abuse, the torture in his past."

The two men stood and watched as Harry sobbed in Severus' arms. Eventually Harry calmed and his sobbed subsided. Sirius and Lucius walked away, leaving Severus to find out what had frightened Harry so badly.

"Care to tell me what that was about?" Severus asked.

"Flashbacks." Harry said simply.

Severus nodded. "I know those demons quite well."

The two sat in silence for a while before Harry broke it.

"It was like I was back in New York again. Draco bumped into me while we were trying to catch the snitch and it was like I could feel their hands all over me again. I could feel them hitting me and kicking me and…" his voice trailed off.

Severus nodded. "I've faced those same types of flashbacks. I can easily say that I understand."

"What…" again Harry's voice trailed off.

"What happened to me, you mean to ask." Severus finished for him.

"Yeah," Harry said quietly.

"There have been many horrible things in my past. Familial abuse, constant taunting and pranking by the hands of other students, my initiation into the Dark Lord's inner circle, and many of the Dark Lord's punishments involve most unpleasant things." Severus said emptily

"How do you stand it?"

"It takes time before the flashbacks stop coming so frequently, and when they stop coming so frequently, it's easier not to think of the event."

"Thank you," Harry said, turning his back to Severus.

He took that as his cue to leave and on his way out he shut the door behind him.


	14. Chapter 14

_AN: Sorry this one took so long to get out. I've been horribly sick for 2 weeks and couldn't get out of bed for about 9 days, but I'm finally up and around and writing again. _

Harry stayed in his room, alone, for most of the day. He came out shortly before dinner and went looking for Draco. When he couldn't find him, he went down to the basement where he knew Severus had a small potions lab. He knocked on the door and was surprised when it popped open.

"Hello Mr. Potter," Severus said, "Would you care to come in?"

"Sure, I guess. I was just looking for Draco." Harry said as he stepped into the room.

"Ah, I'm afraid that after your quidditch match this afternoon he went to visit his friend Blaise. I suspect he's visiting Blaise's sister more than Blaise himself, but what does this old man know?" Severus said.

"What are you working on?" Harry asked, trying to sound interested in the potion brewing over a low flame.

"Wolfsbane, as a favor to your godfather. Or rather to your godfather's best friend." Severus answered.

"For Remus?"

"Yes, since, as far as I know, he's your godfather's only werewolf friend, I'm sure it is for Lupin."

"Can I watch?" Harry asked.

"Right now it has to simmer for twenty-three more minutes, but you're welcome to wait, and watch the final steps after it is finished."

Harry sat down on a stool and watched Severus clean his knives and cutting boards in silence.

Twenty-three minutes went by quickly and soon Harry was standing next to Severus watching him add the last ingredients and and then bottle the potion and put a stasis charm on it to be sent to the werewolf.

"That was pretty neat," Harry said.

"Thank you," Severus said, surprised.

They continued this for several days, Harry would get bored, head for the basement and Severus would allow him to watch the preparations of several different potions, some made for private companies and some of them for the ministry.

One day when Severus was brewing a particularly nonvolatile potion, Harry leaned across the cauldron to get a better look at what Severus was doing, and when Severus looked up, Harry had the uncontrollable urge to kiss him.

Severus was shocked by the peck on the lips and said "What was that?!"

Harry, thinking he was being rejected, completely embarrassed, ran for his bedroom and locked the door.

Severus took off after the boy but their 20 year age difference and Harry's quidditch training was apparent when Severus stepped out of the basement and heard Harry's bedroom door slam on the next floor.

Lucius came out of the kitchen and found Severus standing in the hallway by the basement door looking confused.

"Are you alright Severus?" He asked. "I heard someone running and then a door slam and I come out here and find you standing here alone. What happened?"

"The boy leaned across the cauldron and kissed me. Then he took off running like he'd seen a dementor." Severus said, confused.

"I knew he'd gotten comfortable with you Severus, but I had no idea he was _that_ comfortable." Lucius said. "It's probably best not to mention this to Sirius. I suppose I could try and talk to him."


	15. Chapter 15

Lucius went up the stairs and knocked on Harry's door. When he received no response, he knocked again. This time he was answered with a meek, "Please go away."

"I came up to talk to you, Harry, but if you'd rather, I can go get Sirius." Lucius said smoothly.

Lucius felt the slight wave of magic as Harry unlocked his door from across the room. He opened the door and walked in, flicking his wand to open the heavy curtains that Harry had pulled closed.

"Hey!" Harry said. "I thought this was my room?"

"It is your room, but you're not going to sit in the dark and wallow all day just because you embarrassed yourself. You'll make yourself sick sitting in the dark and pouting all day." Lucius said.

"You have no idea…" Harry started.

"I have some idea of what you've been through, both the embarrassment and the pain. Things happened to me in my past as well Harry. None of us are without our demons. I'm not trying to lessen the pain you're feeling right now, but you have to know that you can't hide forever. I know you're scared and I know that the things that you're feeling toward Severus are confusing you, but I want you to know that you don't have to hide. If you don't think you can talk to Sirius or to Draco, you can come to me if you feel comfortable with it. I'm not going to judge you, ok?" Lucius said, reaching out to his lover's godson.

"I never realized that I'm…"Harry trailed off again.

"Gay?" Lucius prompted.

"Yes. I never realized I was gay before. Not like I ever had a chance to date. I kissed Cho Chang in fifth year, and Ginny Weasley in sixth year and it never felt right but I just figured that was because I was the 'boy who lived' and was too busy fighting off giant snakes and Voldemort to get attracted to a girl. Then all this happened and the only person I thought I could talk to was Severus because I knew some of the things he'd been through from those memories I accidentally saw when he was trying to teach me occlumency. Then I started feeling different about him. Then I don't know what happened, I just leaned over a kissed him, and he hated it! He must hate me now." Harry clamped his mouth shut suddenly, realizing that he'd been pouring his heart out to someone who was nearly a stranger to him.

"Harry, I think that you shouldn't jump to such conclusions. I don't think Severus hates you at all. Perhaps you should talk to him." Lucius suggested.

Harry argued that he'd look like an idiot if he went search for Severus after he'd just ran from him, and Lucius argued back that perhaps looking like an idiot isn't as bad as losing someone you have feelings for because of your foolish pride.

Harry agreed to talk to Severus and Lucius left him to his thoughts.

He sat alone on his bed for a while, contemplating what he would say to the man when someone knocked on his door. "Yeah?" he called out, looking up.

The door cracked open and Severus stepped inside. Harry's head dropped and his fingernails suddenly seemed quite interesting.

"Lucius said that if I came up here, you might be willing to speak with me," Severus said.

Harry nodded, but didn't speak so Severus took the initiative and began, "I think you might have misunderstood my reaction to the kiss."

"Your reaction was pretty obvious, you were disgusted!" Harry blurted.

"I wasn't disgusted in the least! Simply shocked. I've been feeling strangely about you for a little while now, but never really made the connection until you kissed me. I care about you Harry. I wasn't disgusted by you at all, just shocked that you had kissed me and never shown any sign of caring about me in any way." Severus insisted.

"You…like me?" Harry asked.

"Yes." Severus answered simply.

"I like you too, I think." Harry said, hiding his face again.

Severus sat down on the edge of the bed and used a single finger to raise Harry's chin until he was looking him in the eye. "I wouldn't mind kissing you again, and having a chance to kiss you back, if you'd like that."

"I think I'd like that too," Harry said timidly.

Severus leaned toward Harry and kissed him softly on the lips.

They pulled apart seconds later to a screech from the hall.

"Get your filthy hands off of my godson you pervert!" Sirius screamed.


	16. Chapter 16

_AN//I know Harry seems to cry a lot in this fic, but I see nothing wrong with men crying, and I think he has a perfectly good excuse to burst into tears, considering everything he's going through. _

"Siri it's not what you think," Harry started to say.

"Not what I think? I know what I saw! This pervert," he gestured toward Severus, "taking advantage of my godson's vulnerable state."

"I kissed him first," Harry said quietly.

"I want you….What?" Sirius said.

"I kissed him first. Down in the basement. And he asked if he could kiss me back this time." Harry said, still not looking at his godfather.

Sirius turned around and left the room, leaving Harry to burst into tears again.

Severus wrapped his arms around Harry, rubbed soft circles on his back and just let him cry.

Meanwhile, Sirius was storming about the first floor of the manor muttering and knocking things over. Lucius heard him from the other side of the manor and came running to see what was going on. When he saw his love storming about and heard him mutter "Pervert," and "Idiot," he knew what Sirius had witnessed and went immediately to try and calm the man.

Sirius saw him coming and started ranting out loud, "Do you know what I just walked in on?"

"Actually I think that I do, and I might have encouraged it." Lucius said, a bit worried about what hexes the auror might send his way.

"You KNEW?" He yelled. "I should castrate you and then leave you and take Harry with me! You're a bunch of perverts!"

"Sirius you need to calm down right now. I highly doubt Harry is going anywhere with you acting the way you are, since he knows that this is his home no matter what, and Harry and I talked a while ago, and he's only recently come to the conclusion as to why his relationships with the Weasley girl and any other female for that matter, never worked out. He feels safe with Severus and I think you need to back off and let him explore his life, at his pace. If Severus isn't the perfect person for Harry to explore with, I don't know who is. He's the most patient man in the world, you have to be to be a first class potions master, and he's never forced himself on anyone. Give them a chance." Lucius tried to convince Sirius.

"Luc! He's 20! Severus is 42! He's old enough to be his father." Sirius argued.

"He's also more experienced and therefore more likely to understand, and to be careful, if they ever make it to that stage in their relationship. Do you want Harry's first relationship after all this to be with some touchy feely boy his age that is going to scare the living hell out of him, and cause even more damage?" Lucius asked.

"Well no, but can't he find someone besides Severus?" Sirius said weakly.

"I think you're letting that prejudice from school get to you again Sirius, just like you did when I first asked Severus to move some of his things here, so that he could be here for Draco and still do his work."

"Maybe I am," Sirius said, realizing he was defeated. "I guess I should apologize to them."

"I think you should just leave him alone for a little while, Black. He's sleeping right now." Severus said from the door. "Harry needs to rest. His injuries might be healed on the outside, but he still needs to rest. He's been through a lot emotionally lately and your little outburst didn't help matters any."

"Who are you to," Sirius started but Lucius put a hand on his arm to stop him.

"Don't hurt my godson." Sirius said, and walked out of the room.

"I think that is as close to a blessing as you're going to get from him," Lucius said with a laugh. "He's a stubborn one, my Sirius. He'll come around when he sees that you're not going to upset Harry and that you're not going to try to shag him and dump him."

"I'd never do that to anyone, much less Harry. You know I'm not the type to have lovers. I've only been in love once before and that was 22 years ago, I don't do these things lightly." Severus reminded his old friend.

Lucius clapped his friend on the back. "That's just what I was reminding Siri of. I know you're not going to hurt Harry. Lets go have a drink while Harry sleeps and Siri pouts, shall we?"

Severus nodded and the two men went for Lucius' study to have a glass of firewhiskey.


	17. Chapter 17

Harry slept for most of the afternoon and Severus retreated back to the basement to check on the potion that he'd been brewing when Harry had leaned across the cauldron and all the drama of that day had began.

Sirius found Lucius in his study looking over the acquisition paperwork to add a new company to Malfoy Industries.

Sirius sat down on the edge of the desk trying to capture Lucius' attention, but it didn't seem to be working. After a few moments Sirius spoke, "I'm an arse alright. A damned arse that deserves to be whacked around the head with a beaters bat until I learn some sense."

Lucius smiled. "That you are dear, but I still love you. I don't think I'm the one you need to be admitting that to though. I believe dear Harry would benefit from hearing it."

Sirius agreed. "You're right. I should go talk to him."

Lucius pushed him off the edge of the desk and toward the door. Sirius shuffled his feet and walked like a man on the way to his last meal, until Lucius said "He's not going to bite you. He's more than likely going to be afraid of you, you need to get up there, now, and apologize to him."

Sirius picked up his pace and headed for the second floor and down the hall to Harry's bedroom. When he knocked on the door, no one answered. He tried the knob and found it unlocked. He peeked inside but Harry was no where to be seen. "Harry?" he called out, but there was no answer.

He stepped into the room and that's when he heard the shower running in Harry's bathroom. He turned to leave but paused when he heard a whimper from the bathroom. He walked closer and could hear the shower running, a sound that he couldn't quite place, and an occasional whimper. He knocked on the door and didn't receive a response, so he opened the door a crack, the steam almost knocking him over, and said "Harry, are you ok?"

"I can't get it off," was Harry's reply.

"You can't get what off?" Sirius asked, confused.

"It won't come off." Harry said, and Sirius realized the sound that he hadn't placed before was scrubbing. He stuck his head in the door and saw through the curtain that Harry was scrubbing himself under the boiling hot water until his skin was raw and bleeding.

Sirius whipped out his want and summoned the scrubber out of Harry's hand and turned the water off. He grabbed a towel off the rack beside the tub and wrapped it around Harry, who continued to rub his arms, as if trying to get something off. He picked up his shaking godson, who seemed to be in another world and carried him into the bedroom.

Sirius sat Harry on the bed and cast a drying charm over him and called to Lucius for help.

When Lucius found them Sirius was closer to tears. "Luc I don't know what's wrong with him. I came up here to apologize and he was in the shower scrubbing himself bloody. All he has said since I came up here was 'I can't get it off' and 'It won't come off.' I don't know what to do." He said helplessly.

Lucius thought for a moment. "First I think we need to get calming draught in him, before he injures himself further. I'll go get one from Severus and see what he thinks we should do, and you stay here with Harry and make sure he doesn't hurt himself any more."

Lucius went downstairs in search of Severus. He found Draco alone in the library and asked him if he knew where Severus was.

"I think he went to the apothecary to get some stuff, what's up?" Draco asked his father.

"I need a calming draught, and probably a small dose of a pain numbing potion for Harry. Seems he's nearly boiled himself, and scrubbed half his skin off in the shower. Please don't share that with anyone." Lucius said, giving his son a look.

"Don't worry father, what happened to Harry was bad enough without the Prophet getting wind of it, I know." Draco said quickly. "I know where Severus keeps his potions though, I can show you."

Lucius quickly followed Draco to the basement where they went to what appeared to be a muggle file cabinet but opened more like a kitchen cabinet. Draco bent down and pulled out a small vial of pain potion and a large calming draught and handed them both to Lucius before closing the cabinet.

"I'm the only one Severus trusts to key to the ward that he put on it, so I wouldn't bother trying, it will just slide open and be full of papers if you try it," Draco said with a laugh when he saw his father eyeing the cabinet.

Lucius gave his son a hug and ran back up the stairs to Harry's room and gave the potions to Sirius. Draco followed him and stood in the doorway as Sirius encouraged Harry to drink the potions, first the calming, then the pain relief. The second was easier to get down once he had calmed a bit.

Sirius transfigured the towel into a pair of pajama bottoms and helped Harry into the bed.

"Could I talk to Harry?" Draco asked.

"I don't know if that's wise. You boys never got along," Sirius said.

"Go away Sirius. Come here if you want to talk, Draco." Harry said from where he lay on the bed.

Sirius and Lucius left the room, and Draco went inside. "Shut the door or they'll just stand out there in the hall," Harry said.

Draco smirked and pushed the door closed behind him. He walked over and plopped down on the bed.

"You can trust Severus you know." Draco started out. "If you can trust anyone in this world, it's probably Severus. He's seen all the horrible things in the world that there is to see. Nothing is going to shock him, nothing is going to make him dislike you. I know things that Uncle Severus has seen that would make my Dad's toes curl and that's something when you think that my dad played Death Eater just like Severus did for so long."

"I know I can trust him. I'm the one who's been visiting him in the basement all week." Harry said.

"Don't be a smartass, I mean you can talk to him. Like, really talk to him. He'll listen. Like, really listen. Even if you just want to tell him stupid stuff. I tell him stupid stuff all the time and he listens. And he'll remember everything you want him to remember. He's the only one that knows that I have a girlfriend. And he remembers her name."

"You have a girlfriend?" Harry asked. "I thought you were shagging Blaise and didn't want anyone to know."

Draco laughed. "Close but no dice. I'm dating Blaise's sister, Bianca."

"Thanks Draco," Harry said quietly. "When you see Severus, would you ask him to come see me? I don't feel like coming out of here right now."

"Sure Harry. I'm not headed over to see Bianca until tonight. I bet Dad thinks I'm shagging Blaise too," He said with a laugh as he left the room.


	18. Chapter 18

_AN// Forgive me for the extremely short chapter and the crazy long wait. I have an excuse but I know you just want your Snarry so I won't waste your time, lol. There will be another chapter soon. _

Harry stayed in his room for the rest of the day, once again. Around dinner time a knock came at his door and when he opened it he was surprised to find, not Sirius, but Severus with a dinner tray.

"They thought you might not feel like coming down to eat, and Draco said you wanted to see me, so I brought you something to eat." Severus explained.

He sat the tray down on the small table by the window and Harry examined it. A huge bowl of potato soup and a thick chunk of crusty bread, plus a large helping of strawberry tart. He walked away from the table and looked out one of the large windows.

"Draco said you wanted to see me," Severus said again, hoping to prod the young man into saying something.

Harry continued to stand in front of the window until Severus walked up to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "Talk to me Harry, you need to talk to someone."

Harry sighed. "I don't know what to say. Am I supposed to say that I feel like I can't get them off of my skin? Am I supposed to say that I don't know what I want because now everything seems so confusing? Am I supposed to say that every little bump makes me jump? What am I supposed to talk about?"

"All that and more, if it's what you want to say. You don't have to say anything other than what is in your head." Severus said.

He grabbed Harry's hand and pulled him to the small couch at the foot of the bed and sat down with him. "Just talk, and whatever comes out of your mouth, just might make you feel better."

Harry began to speak, and didn't stop for several hours. He started talking about quidditch, getting a nod and an "mmhmm," here and there from Severus. He continued on about playing in the backyard with Draco and getting flashbacks, and then to the flashback that he had in the shower.

"It's not fair." Harry said, and then was quiet.

"Indeed, it's not fair." Severus said.

"You don't even know the half of it," Harry snorted.

"Well then tell me the half of it," Severus replied.

"They took it from me."

"What?"

"I'd never…."Harry ducked his head and Severus could see his cheeks becoming pink.

"You were a virgin?" Severus asked bluntly.

Harry nodded. Severus shook his head.

"You'll have a real first time one day Harry and it will be nothing like that. It will be with a wizard that you care about and that cares about you, and you'll learn what makes making love so special. They took your virginity, but they can never take the special things from you." He said gently, putting his hand on Harry's shoulder. "Someone will show you that one day, when you're ready."

"What if I'm never ready?" Harry asked quietly.

"The person who truly loves you won't care if you're never ready. The person who truly cares about you would wait for eternity if the need be." Severus replied, lifting Harry's head to look into his eyes. "For eternity," and he leaned down and kissed him softly.


	19. Chapter 19

Over the next few weeks Harry opened up a bit more to his godfather, and slowly became more comfortable with spending time alone with the other men in the house. He played quidditch with Draco and read in the library with Lucius when it was rainy.

Severus had quickly earned Sirius' respect, even if they still didn't care for each other. The Marauder could tell that his former enemy was treating his godson perfectly.

Harry and Severus had been taking walks through the gardens after dinner, Harry permitting Severus to kiss him a few times, but nothing more.

One day they stopped and sat down on a bench in underneath a weeping willow that was in full bloom. Severus pulled Harry close and wrapped his arm around him. When Harry stiffened Severus soothed him. "Shhhh, I'm just going to sit here and hold you. Take a deep breathe and let it out slowly."

Harry breathed deeply and calmed down, relaxing against Severus. Severus kissed Harry on top of the head and began to speak. "I was thinking that I might go back to my home for a few days before the next school term begins."

Harry's shoulders fell and his head hung a bit. Severus was tired of him. He knew it would come eventually.

"I'd like you to come with me if you'd feel comfortable. I have a spare bedroom that is more than well equipped for visitors." Severus continued when he felt Harry droop.

Severus' words sunk slowly into Harry's mind and he lifted his head. "You want me to come with you?" He asked, surprised.

"Of course I do. I told you I'd always be here for you. Only if you want to come though. I don't want to do anything that would make you uncomfortable." Severus answered.

"I think I'd like to go," Harry said slowly. "I'm getting tired of sitting around the manor all the time."

"Are you going to tell your godfather or are you going to make me?" Severus teased.

Harry laughed. "I'll tell him, he's less likely to hex me than he is you."

The two sat on the bench a while longer, watching a bird building a nest on a high branch.

"Tell me about your home," Harry asked after a while.

Severus because by telling Harry about the building. He described it as a small black cottage on a large plot of land where he grew his own vegetables in the summer and had a small greenhouse of potions ingredients. Once the two bedrooms and two bathrooms of the cottage had been thoroughly described, Severus began to tell Harry stories about the summers that he spent with his Aunt at Spinners End.

"Once," Severus began, "I was convinced that I was a world class potions master. Keep in mind, I was but 8 years old here. So, I start a fire underneath a cauldron in the kitchen and start popping stuff into it. Mostly harmless stuff, cinnamon, nutmeg, salt, normal kitchen items, then I found some interesting looking things in the back of the pantry and was just about to throw in something that looking really gross when my aunt snatched the bottle out of my hand and shooed me out of the kitchen. Turns out, I was about to pour an entire bottle of boomslang skin into the cauldron that was on full heat."

Harry burst out laughing. "You'd have blown the entire house to the moon!"

"Yes, yes." Severus said, smiling. "It was soon after that little exploration that my aunt decided to start teaching me how to cook, and shortly after that how to make potions. I think she figured if I knew what I was doing, there was less of a possibility that I would blow us all to pieces."

Their chat was interrupted when Sirius came around the corner and said "Well what are you two love birds up to today?"

"Severus and I were just talking about going on a little trip before term starts back up." Harry said.

"Where are we going?" Sirius asked, bouncing on his toes.

"Not you just. Just me and Severus," Harry answered.

"I'm not letting you go anywhere with him," Sirius said, looking sharply at Severus.

"Frankly Sirius, I'm getting sick of your little controlling attitude but seeing as I'm of age, I'm quite able to do whatever I want without your consent." Harry said, getting angry.

Sirius opened his mouth to speak but Harry continued. "You're a grown man, just like I am, and you need to start acting like it. Everytime you see Severus and I sitting together, you look away like you're 8 years old and you just saw your parents kissing. It's ridiculous! I'm a grown man and I can make my own decisions and I am going to Spinner's End with Severus."

Harry stared darkly into Sirius' eyes, daring him to argue.

After a moment, Sirius answered. "You're right. I've been letting my dislike for Severus turn me into a teenager again. I'm sorry Harry. And I'm sorry Severus." He held out his hand to Severus and the men shook.

Harry jumped up from the bench and wrapped his arms around Sirius. "Why do I always have to yell at you to get you to see reason?" He asked.

"I guess you can't teach an old dog new tricks," Lucius said with a smirk, from across the garden.


	20. Chapter 20

Three days later found Harry pacing his bedroom, trunk packed and sitting by his door. Sirius knocked on the door and Harry waved his hand, opening the door.

When Sirius saw Harry pacing, he asked "What's wrong?"

Harry continued to pace and fret. "What if Severus discovers that he can't stand to be alone with me? What if I get on his nerves when there isn't someone around to distract us from each other? What if I ruin everything?"

Sirius smiled and grabbed Harry by the shoulders. "Well, I'm pretty sure old Sniv…Severus is pretty fond of you Harry, and I highly doubt that being alone with you is going to bother him one bit. I rather think that you're both going to enjoy yourselves. You're not going to ruin anything as long as you don't sit around and fret like this the entire time that you're gone."

Harry's hands shook as he picked up his trunk and headed downstairs to meet Severus. They were going to apparate straight from the manor to Spinners End.

Severus was sitting in the downstairs sitting room when Harry walked in. The former bane of most every child who entered Hogwarts stood up and smiled when he saw Harry coming. "Are you ready to go?" He asked gently.

"Yes, I'm ready." Harry said a bit shakily.

Severus took both of their trunks and banished them to Spinners End so that they wouldn't have to carry them as they apparated. He then took Harry's hand and they said their goodbyes to Sirius, Lucius and Draco before disapparating away.

Seconds later they landed in the front garden of a beautiful little cottage on the outskirts of London.

"Harry, this is my home, Spinners End." Severus said, watching Harry for a reaction.

"It's….beautiful." Harry said, sounding a bit mystified as he took in the spacious gardens that were so well tended that their beauty rivaled that of the gardens back at Malfoy Manor.

Severus guided Harry through the gardens and up to the small cottage in the middle. They entered into a cozy room lined with bookshelves and filled with cozy overstuffed furniture.

Harry smiled "Not exactly what anyone would expect the great dungeon bat to have in his house," he said teasingly.

Severus smirked. "I bet no one expects the great dungeon bat to have The Boy Who Lived in his house either. Or if they do, they expect that I'm chopping you up for potions ingredients, or perhaps dinner."

Harry laughed, calming noticeably. Severus led him through the rest of the house, showing him the kitchen, study, his lab in the basement, the bathrooms and finally the bedrooms. He opened a door about halfway down a hallway, "This is your bedroom, and that," he pointed to a door at the end of the hall, "is mine. You're welcome to come to my room if you need anything at all while we are here. I won't enter your room without knocking and receiving permission first."

"Thank you Severus," Harry said quietly, knowing that the man was trying to make him as comfortable as possible. He stood on his tip toes and pecked Severus on the lips.

Severus smiled and said "Would you like to see the back gardens now?"

Harry nodded and Severus took his hand, leading him through the house and out the door that Harry had noticed earlier in the kitchen.

The back gardens were even more beautiful than the front, if that was even possible. Flowers and herbs in every color of the rainbow were mixed and matched to perfection. Harry felt like he'd walked into a painting.

Severus led him down a path pointing out this potions ingredient among the flowers and that one among the herbs. At the end of the path there was a small table with two chairs and Harry and Severus sat down, still holding hands.

Severus pulling Harry's hand closer to him and kissed it before beginning to speak. "You know Harry, I've been holding off on saying this because I haven't wanted to scare you, but I have to say it now, it just can't wait any longer. Harry Potter, I love you. I love you like I've never loved anyone in my life."

Harry sat speechless for a few moments, and then tears began to form in his eyes. "I love you too," he whispered.

Severus stood up and stepped to Harry's side of the table before pulling Harry up with him and holding him close to his chest. "You have no idea how much it means to me to hear you say that."

"I do," Harry said after a moment of silence. "I know how much it means because it feels the same way for me. No one has ever loved me before."

"I'll love you forever Harry, if you'll let me." Severus replied.

Harry was still and quiet for just long enough to make Severus nervous before he raised his head and looked at Severus with tears shining in his eyes. "I'm kind of afraid," he admitted.

Severus paused only a moment before responding, "You do know that I would never pressure you into doing anything that you're not ready for don't you? I meant what I said when I told you that the person that truly loves you would wait forever for you."

"I know," Harry assured the other man. "It's just that I want to be ready, but I'm still afraid. I…"

"You what?" Severus prodded.

"I've been getting…" he trailed off again.

"Aroused?" Severus finished for him.

Harry nodded, no longer looking Severus in the eye.

Severus put his fingers gently under Harry's chin and lifted his head until he was looking into his eyes. "That's nothing to be ashamed of. It's been several months since your attack and you're beginning to heal. Things are bound to start arousing you again. It's completely natural, love."

Harry shook his head in frustration. "It's not that I'm ashamed of it, it's just strange to talk about it sometimes and it's sure strange to want to do something about it and being afraid to."

"Perhaps we could try small things for now, to see how comfortable you are with moving our relationship along." Severus suggested.

Harry seemed open to the idea. "What kind of small things?" he asked.

"For starters I suppose we could stop wearing enough clothes that we could survive several days in a blizzard, when we are just around the house," Severus suggested, teasing.

Harry laughed, "That might be a good idea."

The two spent the rest of the afternoon outside exploring Severus' gardens, as well as laughing and joking with each other.

When afternoon turned into evening and the sun began to set they headed indoors, shedding their shoes and robes to make dinner together in Severus' small kitchen.


	21. Chapter 21

The next morning when Harry opened his eyes to bright sunshine and the cool colors of the bedroom he was confused for a moment before he remembered that he was at Spinners End with Severus.

He crawled out of bed in only his pajama bottoms and went for his trunk before remembering his talk with Severus the afternoon before and decided to brave it and head down to the kitchen just as he was.

When he descended the stairs and walked into the kitchen Severus was immersed in the morning Prophet and didn't notice him. He headed toward the table and plopped down across from him.

Severus looked up from his paper, raised his eyebrows and went back to the paper. He couldn't help but notice the sculpted muscles of the boy's chest and abdomen and wondered if Harry was purposefully torturing him or if he was just oblivious.

"Good mooooooooorrrrrning Severus," Harry sang, grinning at the older man.

"Good morning, Harry." Severus said, hiding a smile.

"An owl came for you while you were lazing about," Severus said, pointing to the counter by the sink before going back to the Prophet.

Harry jumped up and bounded over to the sink, tripping over a chair on his way. He snatched the letter up and ripped into it.

"My lord, do you ever do anything at the speed of a normal wizard?" Severus asked.

Harry laughed and began to read the letter.

A smile spread across his face until Severus was sure that it would crack. "Something you like?" he asked with a smirk.

"Dumbledore offered to let me teach flying at the school." Harry said excitedly, not taking his eyes from the letter.

"Isn't that interesting." Severus said, hiding a smile behind his paper. "I suppose you'll be able to pester me at school every day as well now won't you?"

"You had something to do with this didn't you?" Harry accused with a smile.

"I simply mentioned to the Headmaster that you didn't have anything to do this fall and it was a shame that you would be sitting around the manor with Lucius and Sirius while Draco was off at the Ministry for his apprenticeship and I was back to Hogwarts teaching." Severus said. "He came up with something for you to do all on his own."

Harry walked back to the table and threw his arms around the man that he had come to love. "Thank you so much Severus, I think I would have went crazy without anything to do."

Severus pulled Harry down into his lap and hugged him tightly. "I think I would have went crazy as well, only being able to see you on the weekends."

Harry hopped up and suggested "How about a picnic to celebrate? I'll pack!"

"Very well," Severus said. "I'll go and get dressed and find a blanket while you figure out what to feed us. It is nearly time for lunch."

Harry transfigured a dish towel into a picnic basket and set about filling it with things from the kitchen. He packed a loaf of crusty bread, some cold chicken that he found in the refrigerator, bottles of ice cold butterbeer and some chocolate chip cookies.

As he was closing the basket he heard Severus coming and looked up. When the lanky man came around the corner Harry's jaw dropped.

"What?" Severus asked, looking around.

"It's just that I've never seen you in anything that wasn't black with a thousand buttons," Harry said with a laugh.

Severus was wearing dark washed jeans and a green tshirt.

"I didn't think robes were appropriate for spending time outdoors on the ground," he said with a shrug.

Harry ran to his room and changed into an old pair of jeans and a tshirt and headed back to the kitchen.

They grabbed the basket and headed out into the gardens.


	22. Chapter 22

After a lazy afternoon of watching clouds in the garden, Harry picked up the basket while Severus folded the blanket and they headed back inside to get ready for dinner.

"Do you have any decent clothes with you?" Severus asked the younger wizard.

"I don't have any decent clothes," Harry replied. "Why?"

"Because I'm taking you out for dinner and would prefer that you didn't look like a homeless person." Severus replied. "Come with me and I'll get you something to wear.

Harry followed Severus to his bedroom where he watched the older man dig through his closet and come out with two pair of black slacks and two button down, silk shirts, one black and one emerald green.

Severus tossed the green shirt and a pair of the pants to Harry and laid the others on the bed. "We'll take you to Diagon Alley tomorrow before we head to the castle, to get you some proper clothing, you can't wear holey t-shirts and jeans that are 5 sizes too big to teach, but we can shrink these a bit for now, they'll do for dinner."

Harry turned to leave the room but Severus put a hand on his shoulder. "We're both men Harry, and I can turn my back if you'd prefer, but you don't have to leave the room to change your clothes."

The younger wizard shook his head. "You're right, I'm just not used to all this yet." He yanked his t-shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor.

Severus took off his shirt as well and started to walk a few steps away to give Harry a bit of privacy, but it was Harry's turn to stop Severus. "Severus, come back here for a second." When the older man hesitated, he added "Please."

Severus turned and walked back to Harry. When he reached the young man, Harry surprised him by putting a hand on Severus' shoulder and leaning up to place a soft kiss on his lips. Severus placed a hand gently on Harry's hip and pulled him closer. He kissed Harry thoroughly. When Severus pulled back, Harry was gasping and had obviously enjoyed the kiss.

"I know you're not ready for more, but I had to kiss you," Severus explained.

"I liked that," Harry said once he had caught his breath.

"We'd best get dressed if we're going to get to the restaurant in time to make our reservation." Severus said, walking toward his clothes on the bed.

Harry turned his back and stripped off his pants. Severus admired the movement of the muscles in Harry's back as he pulled on his pants and used his wand to charm them to fit.

Severus stripped off his own clothing and began to dress.

When both men were dressed and ready to go, Severus took Harry's hand and Apparated them to a beautiful little restaurant somewhere that Harry didn't recognize.

"Where are we?" He asked, taking in the beautiful town around him.

"We're in a small village outside of Rome." Severus answered. "This little place has been a favorite of mine since I was a young professor freshly out of Hogwarts."

"It's beautiful." Harry said, still in awe.

They entered the restaurant together and were seated at a small table in a dark corner. As the hostess walked away to seat another party, Severus pulled out his wand and tapped the table twice. Menus appeared in front of both of them in a language that Harry assumed was Italian.

"I..uh… I can't read this," Harry said.

Severus spent the next few minutes explaining the menu to Harry and then ordering in Italian for both of them.

As they waited for their food, they discussed their return to Hogwarts, Harry's nerves about teaching students barely younger than himself, and their mutual relief to be close to each other when the school year started.

The food came and Harry was pleasantly surprised to see roasted chicken with steamed vegetables in front of them.

"It looks great," he said approvingly.

They tucked into their food and quietly worked their way through the spread in front of them. When they both had their fill, Severus signaled the waiter and said something in Italian that Harry didn't understand. A few moments later the waiter came back with a large slice of cheesecake and two forks.

Severus picked up and fork and cut off a bite, then moved toward Harry with it.

Realizing what Severus meant to do, Harry opened his mouth and accepted the bite, closing his eyes and softly moaning at the silky smooth texture. After swallowing he opened his eyes and fed Severus a bite. The two men went back and forth, feeding each other bites until the entire slice was gone and they were both mildly aroused.

Severus paid the waiter and they left the restaurant, Disapparating back to Severus' house.


	23. Chapter 23

_AN: This is the chapter that you've all been waiting for. Obviously if you don't want to read about Harry and Severus getting intimate, don't bother with this chapter. I took special care with the chapter and it took a while to get it right. _

They stumbled into the house and landed on the couch together. "I don't know if I'm ready for this," Harry said, panting.

"Just tell me to stop and I will," Severus said, kissing Harry's neck.

"Oh please, don't stop." Harry moaned.

Severus made quick work of the buttons on Harry's shirt, his lips and tongue following his fingers down Harry's chest. He pushed the shirt back off of his young lover's shoulders and admired the masculine beauty in front of him.

Harry squirmed momentarily under Severus' gaze but before he had time to become really uncomfortable Severus was back to lavishing Harry's chest and abdomen in kisses, nibbles and licks.

Harry's keening and moaning at Severus' attentions was all that could be heard, had anyone decided to put their ear to the front door of Spinner's End.

Severus' hand slipped down and unfastened Harry's pants but he kept his attention focused on the younger man's upper body. He felt Harry tense but Severus calmed his lover, cupping his cheek and kissing him softly on the lips.

"I promise, I'm not going to hurt you, but if you want me to stop, just say so."

Harry shook his head. "Please, more," he begged.

Severus smiled and paused only to remove his own shirt before pulling Harry's slacks off and tossing them aside.

He remembered himself and Harry's past and picked his young lover up and carried him to the master bedroom and laid him on the bed.

Severus crawled up after him and thoroughly kissed Harry on the mouth. As they were kissing, his fingers made their way to the waistband of Harry's boxers and slipped inside. Severus looked Harry in the eyes, and when no move was made to stop him, he wrapped his hand around Harry's member and began to stroke him.

Harry threw his head back and moaned.

Severus, taking this as a sign of approval, used his other hand to slide Harry's boxers off as he continued to stroke the younger man.

"Not going to…" Harry panted.

Severus slid his mouth around Harry's cock and worked his lips up and down the shaft, alternately sucking lightly then harder.

Moments later Harry's back arched and he cried out as he came in Severus' mouth. He fell back against the bed panting and looked at Severus, who had moved up beside him on the bed.

Severus wrapped his arms around the naked man and held him close, listening to his breathe even and his heart slow back to a normal pace.

"Make love to me." Harry said quietly. "Show me what it's supposed to be like."

Severus was stunned, not expecting his love to be ready for sex for quite some time. "Are you certain Harry?" He asked gently.

"Yes," Harry said. "I know you won't hurt me, and I know you'll stop if I ask you to. I want it so badly, and I'm tired of being afraid."

Severus kissed the back of Harry's neck, sending shivers down the young man's spine. He reached over to the bedside table and opened a drawer, pulling out a small vial. He danced his fingers down Harry's side, lightly. "Roll onto your back," he urged. "I want to watch your beautiful face," he explained, also knowing that Harry's attackers had taken him on his knees.

Harry watched Severus as he moved off the bed and peeled off his trousers and boxers and then climbed back onto the bed.

Severus nudged Harry's legs apart and kneeled between them. He leaned forward and kissed Harry gently. "I'm going to prepare you, and it might be uncomfortable at first. If you need me to stop, or want me to, just tell me."

Harry nodded and with that Severus uncorked the vial and poured a little lube onto his fingers. He put his hand between Harry's legs and began to gently open him up. He slid one slick finger inside Harry and wiggled it around, lightly brushing Harry's prostate and pulling a gasp from the young man. He then added another finger, and after a while, followed with a third.

When Harry was as prepared as he could be, Severus poured more of the lube over his member and placed himself at Harry's entrance. Harry tensed and Severus pulled away, leaning down again and kissing Harry gently. "This might be uncomfortable or hurt a little at first, but I promise it gets so much better. Once I enter you, I won't move until you tell me it's ok."

Harry took a deep breath and let it out, then nodded.

Severus brushed his hand down Harry cheek and kissed him once more before slowly and carefully guiding himself inside his lover. Halfway in he stopped and brushed a tear from Harry's cheek. "Does it hurt too much love?" he asked, concerned.

Harry shook his head, "I love you," he whispered.

"I love you," Severus said as he continued slowly sliding himself in until he was buried completely inside Harry and he stopped. "Are you ok?"

The younger man let out a shaky breathe and nodded. "Move a little," he said, looked into Severus' eyes.

The older man began to slowly pull out and push his way back in. When Harry gasped, Severus froze. "No, don't stop." Harry begged.

Severus continued to slowly make love to the beautiful young man before him. Watching Harry gasp and moan, writhing underneath him made Severus' stamina go out the window.

Harry had gotten hard again thanks to Severus's careful ministrations. Severus wrapped his hand around Harry and began to stroke him in time with his thrusts.

In moments Harry was screaming his second orgasm of the night, and between the sight of his lover shooting all over both of them, and the tight clenching around him, Severus came with Harry, moaning his lover's name loudly.

Severus collapsed to the bed, muttering a cleansing charm and pulling Harry close to him. Harry snuggled against Severus' chest and sighed. "I love you," he told the older man.

"And I love you, more than you know." Severus replied.

It wasn't long before both of them were sound asleep, arms and legs tangled around each other.


	24. Chapter 24

_AN: Harry and Severus are a bit intimate in this chapter as well._

Harry awoke feeling warm and utterly comfortable as the sun shined through the window and onto his face. He then realized that there was someone spooning his back and an erection pressed firmly against his arse.

He tensed and then remembered the night before. He willed himself to relax, knowing he was safe.

Severus stirred and mumbled, "Good morning love, how did you sleep?"

Harry stretched as he considered the question. "Great actually. I slept wonderfully," he said with a smile. He snuggled back against Severus and enjoyed his new found comfort with the man.

"Would you like to get out of bed today, or should we just stay here?" Severus teased.

"Hmm, tough decision," Harry teased back. "Maybe we should just stay here."

Severus kissed the back of Harry's neck. "I don't believe you're quite up to that just yet, however appealing the idea is and I've got a firecall to Albus to make this morning."

Harry turned in Severus' arms and faced the man. "I bet I could keep you in bed for a bit longer," he teased.

"Oh, you think so?" Severus asked, intrigued.

Harry's hand was suddenly wrapped around Severus' erection and the older man momentarily forgot how to speak.

Harry moved his hand up and down Severus' member and stroked him carefully. "Oh Harry," Severus breathed.

Harry slid down Severus' body and was soon face to face with the cock in his hand. He timidly leaned forward and licked the head, pulling a gasp from Severus that made him look up nervously.

Upon seeing the look on Severus' face, he knew that the gasp had been pure pleasure and with a grin, he leaned forward and licked him again. Timidly he wrapped his lips around his lover and slowly bobbed his head up and down, sucking carefully.

Severus was soon in complete ecstasy and clutching the sheets around him. Never had he met anyone who learned his quirks and trigger spots so quickly.

"Harry, I'm going to come," he managed to get out, moments before he exploded in Harry's mouth.

Harry swallowed quickly, much to Severus' surprised. He then sat up and said "Told you I could keep you in bed a little longer."

Severus stared at his lover for a moment and then grinned, "Cheeky brat," he said as he reached down and pulled Harry back to him. "You're wonderful, you know that? I never would have asked you to try that this soon."

"I think last night made me not as nervous," Harry explained. "I mean, I've always known you'd never hurt me, but last night really cemented in my head that you love me and you're nothing like what happened before and I can really trust you. I knew even if I couldn't give you head, you wouldn't get mad at me, so I wanted to try."

Severus shook his head. He had never imagined that he'd be anyone's rock the way that he seemed to be for Harry. It was an amazing feeling.

He wrapped his arms tightly around Harry and kissed him again. "You're beautiful."

"No, I'm not." Harry said.

"Yes you are, but if you don't like beautiful, handsome will work." Severus argued.

"I don't believe it." Harry said, not quite looking at his older lover.

"You really don't believe me, do you?" Severus said in disbelief.

"Nope," Harry answered.

"I suppose I'll spend the rest of my life proving it to you then. Or at least I will if you don't run off a leave me for a sexy young man," Severus said teasingly.

"Severus? Severus did you forget I was calling this morning?" Albus Dumbledore's voice called from the fireplace in the kitchen, putting an end to their morning in bed.


	25. Chapter 25

_AN: Edited to fix my lack of memory. Sorry about that, I wrote this chapter over several days and didn't realize that I'd doubled up on something. _

Severus quickly threw on a pair of lounge pants and headed for the kitchen, leaving Harry naked in his bed.

"Good morning Severus," the head of Albus Dumbledore greeted him from the fireplace as he stepped into the kitchen. "Having a lie in this morning are we?"

Severus was sure he saw a twinkle in the nosy old man's eye, even thorough the green flames of the floo. "Something like that, yes Albus."

"I believe you scheduled this floo call Severus, may I inquire as to what you need?" Dumbledore asked.

"I don't think Harry Potter is in any shape to be stuck up in Gryffindor tower alone. He has nightmares that even Dreamless Sleep can not keep at bay. The only thing that works is to have someone close by."

"What might you suggest Severus?"

This time Severus was sure that he saw a twinkle in Dumbledore's eye.

"I think Albus, that since he is most comfortable with me, that for the time being another bedroom be added in my chambers, so that I may be there to assist him if a nightmare should occur." Severus explained.

"Indeed Severus, I think that is a splendid idea." Dumbledore said with a knowing smile.

Severus mentally cursed the man who he knew absolutely loved the fact that Severus had finally found someone to care about.

"Thank you Albus, that was all I needed to speak with you about. I wanted to make sure that the boy would be comfortable when we make our trip to Hogwarts tonight."

"Good day then, Severus." Dumbledore's head said as it disappeared from the flames and the floo quieted.

Harry padded into the kitchen just then, yawing. "So what did Dumbledore want?" He asked.

"The headmaster was merely confirming our living arrangements for this term. You'll be staying in my chambers. In your own room of course." Severus said calmly, gauging Harry's reaction.

"Cool," was Harry's only reply as he plopped down at the table. "What's for breakfast?"

Severus chuckled as he used his want to set the stove to work making eggs and bacon for the two of them. When it was done, he levitated two plates over to the table and sat down across from Harry.

"What are we doing today?" Harry asked, in between forks full of eggs and bacon.

Severus swallowed and took a drink of tea before responding, "I believe I promised you a trip to the shops to get you some proper clothing before you become a Hogwarts teacher."

Harry's eyes lit up, then he frowned. "Nothing with a billion buttons like your clothes all seem to have, I hope," he said, teasing Severus.

Severus stifled a smile and said, "I should think not, you'd miss breakfast every morning trying to get dressed."

The pair looked at each other for a moment before Harry burst out in laughter and Severus chuckled, reveling in the response that a tiny bit of harmless teasing pulled from his young lover.

The two finished their breakfast and Severus quickly scourgified their dishes before they headed to their rooms to change clothes.

Harry dressed in the same clothes he had borrowed from Severus the night before and Severus was similarly dressed when they met back in the kitchen a few minutes later.

"I've made an appointment for you at my tailor. Every wizard should have properly fitted robes, they're much more comfortable than off the rack robes." Severus told Harry.

The pair went through the floo and into the largest store Harry had ever been in.

They were met by a small, dark haired wizard and escorted straight to the back of the store to a private fitting room where Harry was poked and measured by the little wizard until he was sure that the man would know his measurements from memory.

They were then sent into a larger room where the bolts of fabric were kept and Harry was instructed to pick out colors for as many sets of robes as he was planning on buying.

Severus expected him to head straight for the awful maroon and gold fabrics in Harry's house colors, but was surprised when Harry stopped at a beautiful navy blue and followed that with an emerald green that almost perfectly matched his eyes.

Harry continued to surprise his older lover as he choose another shade of blue, a black and a charcoal grey bolt of fabric for his robes. After he had taken the first 5 bolts of fabric to the little wizard he began to sort through the finer fabrics and Severus realized he was looking for fabric for dress robes. Harry finally choose a midnight black silk with tiny, almost microscopic blue threads throughout it and took it to the little wizard as well.

They were told to come back in 2 hours and all the robes would be ready. Harry whispered something to the little wizard and he smiled and nodded. Severus was curious as to what the exchange was about, but didn't pry. If Harry wanted to tell him, he would.

Next, Severus surprised Harry by taking him to meet Sirius, Lucius and Draco at a little café down the street from the tailor shop.

"Siri!" Harry shouted, earning himself several frowns from the other customers in the little outdoor garden.

Sirius jumped up and hugged Harry, Lucius and Draco followed suit, though a bit more dignified than Harry and Sirius had been.

They all ordered lunch once Harry and Severus were seated, and Harry told them all about the new position at Hogwarts and Lucius surprised them all by announcing that Professor Flitwick had decided to semi-retire and only teach the Hogwarts Choir so Lucius would be taking over Charms class and Sirius would sometimes be living in the castle as well.

Their lunch soon appeared and the table grew quiet as they all tucked into large hamburgers, thick, crispy fries and chocolate milk shakes. For several minutes they ate in silence until Sirius spoke. "Where are your quarters going to be Harry? Lucius and I have quarters in the upper part of the dungeons, maybe we'll be close by."

Harry thought for a moment and realized he had no desire to be the one to tell Sirius where he'd be sleeping. "Severus, didn't you say the headmaster floo'd this morning? Did you say anything to him about where I'll be staying?" He asked innocently.

Giving Harry a dirty look, he said calmly, "You'll be staying in a spare room in my quarters."


	26. Chapter 26

_AN: Sooner or later this fic has to end, so everyone leave me a review telling me how you'd like to see the story end. My favorite idea will make it into the story, and you will receive credit for the idea. Let me know! I do not want this one to end with a wedding or a honeymoon. It can go further than that, but I don't want it to end there because too many of my other fics end that way._

Without even thinking of Harry's opinion Sirius exclaimed, "What's wrong with Harry having his own quarters?"

"The headmaster and I believe that Harry would feel safer and be able to sleep more calmly if someone is there to wake him from his nightmares." Severus said quietly.

"Well then Harry can come and stay in our quarters with us, can't he Luc?" Sirius said.

Lucius looked from Sirius to Harry and then to Severus. Sirius and Severus were both staring at him, awaiting an answer, while Harry was suddenly quiet interested in a speck of dirt under his finger nail.

"I think Harry should be the one to decide where he stays, not you or I, my love." Lucius said gently to Sirius.

Harry looked up to Lucius with an incredibly grateful look on his face. "I think I'd like to stay in Severus' chambers, Siri." Harry looked to his godfather for support.

Sirius opened his mouth in protest but received two sharp kicks to his shins, one from his lover and one from his stepson, so he quickly snapped his mouth shut. After taking a deep cleansing breath Sirius spoke. "If that's what makes you happy Harry, then I'm all for it."

Harry's entire body visibly relaxed and a smile broke out on his face. "Thanks Siri."

The five-some continued to eat and talk and before they knew it, 2 hours had come and gone.

Harry got up and hugged his godfather, Lucius and Draco again, explaining that they had to go pick up his new robes from the tailors.

Severus and Harry parted from the others promising to see them that night at Hogwarts.

They started back up the street toward the tailor shop when Harry put his hand on Severus' arm and stopped him. "Thank you for that. I know you and Sirius have never been very friendly. Thank you for putting up with him for me."

"I'd put up with just about anything for you my love." Severus replied softly before pulling Harry close to him and planting a kiss on top of the younger man's head.

They made their way to the tailor and went inside. Harry's robes were ready, but Severus noticed an extra package. He looked questioningly at Harry, who gave him a smug grin and turned his back, paying the small wizard.

After everything was settled, Harry and Severus went back through the floo and landed in Severus' kitchen.

After dusting themselves off, they went to their rooms to pack their trunks for the trip to the school.

Harry popped into Severus' room just as he was closing his trunk, holding a package. "I got these for you," he said shyly, not quite looking Severus in the eyes.

The older wizard opened the package and found the most stunning set of dress robes. It was almost the same fabric as Harry's dress robes only the fabric had little green threads throughout it.

"Harry," Severus breathed. "These are so beautiful. Those fabrics must cost a fortune."

"Nah, besides, you've done so much for me over the past few months that any amount of money wouldn't be too much. You've given me myself back." Harry said quietly.

Severus walked over to his lover and wrapped the younger man in his arms. "I believe you've given me something as well."

"What do you mean?" Harry asked as he looked up at Severus.

"I love you Harry. I never thought I'd find happiness in this lifetime, and you've given it to me."

Tears glistened in Harry's eyes and he started into the face of the man that he once thought couldn't stand the sight of him. "I love you too Severus." He said, his voice thick.

Severus cleared his throat, tears evident in his eyes. "Lets get our things and head on to the castle. If we're lucky we can have a little while to settle in before the rest of the teachers arrive and want to get a peek at you."

The men grabbed their trunks and Apparated to just outside the school's gates and walked up the long path to the castle.


	27. Chapter 27

Harry and Severus had no sooner stepped through the gates when they were met by Hagrid.

"Harry!" the half-giant exclaimed as he swept the young wizard into a huge hug.

Harry stiffed momentarily before relaxing and returning the hug almost as enthusiastically as the large man had hugged him.

"Ello Professor Snape. Funny the two of you getting here at the same time like that," Hagrid mused.

"Yes, funny that," Snape said dryly.

"Hagrid," Harry started, before being interrupted by Severus.

"Harry don't you think we should be heading to our quarters now?" the older wizard asked with a little smile on his face.

Harry shot Severus a dirty look before finishing his explanation. "Hagrid, Severus and I will be staying together here at the school, We're…well we're a couple," he finished timidly, looking at the half-giant for a response.

Hagrid looked from Harry to Severus and back again. A large smile spread across his face and he clapped them both on the back with his enormous hands. "About time the two of you found someone."

Harry and Severus continued on to the castle, leaving Hagrid to tend the grounds and prepare for the students arrival. They made it to the great doors to the entrance hall before they were met by Professor Dumbledore, twinkling eyes and all.

"Good afternoon boys, so nice to see you both." the old man said with a knowing, but warm, smile.

The three men walked to the dungeons together, Harry filling Dumbledore in on some of the goings on of the summer.

Severus paused as they came to the portrait that stood guard over the entrance to his chambers.

"I would ask that you allow Harry and I to continue on alone. A bit of privacy to unpack and settle in before we must face the masses."

Dumbledore readily agreed and then left them to unpack their things.

After crossing the threshold and firmly closing the door behind them, Severus wrapped his long arms around Harry's thin body pulled him close, resting his head on top of Harry's.

Just as the older man planted a kiss on the top of his young lovers head, there was a sharp knock at his portrait door.

Severus' head drooped as he had to let go of the gorgeous man in his arms to answer the door.

When the portraid swung open Poppy Pomphry and Minerva McGonagall stood in the hallway, peeking around Severus, trying to see Harry.

They both said a quick hello to Severus before pushing past him and wrapping their arms around Harry in a huge, squeezing hug.

Harry looked helplessly at Severus.

The older man held out his hand and as the two women let go of Harry, the young man quickly took his hand and Severus once again pulled him close, wrapping his arms protectively around his young lover.

Madame Pomphrey's mouth dropped open but Professor McGonagall smiled warmly and patted Severus on the shoulder as she let the still shocked mediwitch out of the dungeons, promising to head the other professors off for the day so that Harry and Severus could have some time to unpack and settle in before the children arrived.

Harry and Severus spent a little while unpacking their belongings and settling in. The door to the spare room that Dumbledore had added to their chambers was never looked at twice, let alone opened.

The rest of their day was spent relaxing and napping in bed, Severus holding Harry closely.


	28. Chapter 28

_AN: This is the final chapter folks. Enjoy! Only one person gave me suggestions, so her suggestions won and this chapter and the one before it are for her. _

Harry sat at the head table and watched the students file into the Great Hall. He glanced to his right at Hagrid's enormous empty chair before reaching under the table to his left and squeezing his sour faced boyfriend's thigh.

Severus turned his head sharply and monentarily glared at Harry before his face softened ever so slightly and he managed a slight smile for the younger man that he adores so very much.

Harry beamed at the small display of affection in front of the students. He squeezed Severus' thigh again, showed the older man how much he really appreciated the slight smile.

Neither man noticed the looks that passed between many of the more observant students. At that moment, Harry and Severus only had eyes for each other.

Just as the whispers started, Hagrid led the first years into the Great Hall. Professor McGonagall stood in front of the line and began calling out names.

Cheers and jeers rang through the Great Hall as students were sorted into their houses.

The last names were called and Professor Dumbledore stood and mad his yearly speech, ending it by announcing the new professors for the year.

Harry was so deep in thought that when his name was called, Severus had to nudge him, bringing forth giggles from several female students.

After the feast was finished, Harry and Severus returned to their quarters and Severus asked the question that he'd been wondering about all night.

"Harry, what were you thinking about at dinner?"

"I was just realizing how lucky I am. I'm back in the first place that I ever called home, I have a real family, no matter how unconventional. Most of all, I'm in love with a wonderful man who loves me back. What else could I possibly need?"


End file.
